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2020.09.20 04:50 MaryJaneIceLilElly83 New

Starting to believe I have Medium capabilities and powers for the first time tonight
I suppose this is an introduction post for me! Since I am brand spanking new!! Lol thank you very much for having me also!!
So I will get straight to the point I went out on a date with a very lovely and very chivalrous gentleman this evening we actually got home not in the evening.
To say the least it was far closer to the early morning LOL probably about two if not three or so in the morning to be exact, we started down my local street just gone down pretty much every day for my entire life I know the streets very well I saw it I can only describe as figures that look like the head on overly baggy street clothes on them ( well just wearing them nothing out of the ordinary at all!) the only thing out of the ordinary at all about them was they appear to me made or even sew-in together with shadows !!! Literal shadows cause it was VERY. Obviously black as the night ebony sky!, however the material was quite obviously sheer and see through !
The cloths had no real detail to them all but dual, causal , average .... maybe even sporty? Or Athletic ? ........... some I would see for only a second if not two and they moved SERIOUSLY FAST!!! Well and yet they kind of didn’t it was almost as though they were moving quite obviously beyond the speed of light but the appearance they gave in the room I was seeing them in looked as though they were casually walking either of the sidewalk or down it or down a city sidewalk for all I knew!? At a very casual leisurely pace was what the man surely of them were doing and those were the ones that I saw the most stuff they were a lot of them they only showed up in ones or twos and they usually showed up near trees would appear for maybe one or two seconds and then they would go away, there were a few that showed up in the middle of the street, That we’re obviously out jogging getting exercise some of it felt like I was watching I’m not home videos but like pre-recorded videos of a fairly good Lee populated area maybe sort of like how the Truman show was?
None of them had any defining details and stood out above any of the rest they all are pretty much the same and after probably about 10 minutes or so of watching them appear in various different places ice rink to realize they were not paying attention to me they were not looking at me so, when I noticed I was not being paid attention to I did feel a bit more but ease but not entirely!
Lmao To be very blunt about it my skin is still goosebumps and my hair is still on its hands I’m not even looking at it and I can tell that lol!!
But I do not feel as though I reacted this way because I felt is the way it was in danger.
I feel is though I reacted this way because it is a part of my brain that is opening up yet more channels two parts of my powers that I am struggling to be made aware of which I was told by my elders that this would occur as I grew more and allowed myself to grow more.
I was told never to doubt divisions that I saw whether they be from the Fay, spirits of any kind, Astro, elemental probably a lot of things I am not even remotely aware of because there’s too damn much out there LOL. And I cannot remember but I think I was also told to not show fear or if I did have fear to at least control it as much as possible and to hold on to your spirit guides when you feel afraid for their the ones that will help guide you and keep you safe and guide you back to the light!!🌞💫
Being a newbie most everything in my brain it has to do with other rooms I cannot say that I know for sure what I saw was what I think it was and of course if I was to talk to my very very conservative mother who is also very Christian upstairs she’s of course tell me that it was all in my head??!!!
I cannot in good conscience tell myself that or believe it🤐😱🤭 I might not know what it was that I saw I am personally journaling this down myself as “shadow figures “I am sure somebody here will tell me that they go buy some thing else I am most certainly sure somebody will cause there’s always somebody out there that’s smarter than me LOL until I find a book about it and read it myself lmao !!! Lol yes I am a bratty lil B🤬!
Smartbutt lol but I think my nerdy geeky brain tryin lamely to calm itself the hell down also lol I know deep in my heart my god that this was the first experience for myself as in awakening medium, starting her journey into her power or abilities I guess might be a better term to use.
And I know that I am shaky as a leaf and have goosebumps and my hair standing on age is because despite what anybody else thinks or tails me til the day I die I know that this is my first interactive well maybe not interactive but at least View into a realm of the paranormal ! I know what I saw was paranormal activity of some degree and I don’t even know that much about paranormal stuff and I didn’t feel like I had to my gut told me that it was going on at least that basic knowledge was made clear to me by not a spirit guide per se but just my inner being told me that! Do you even though I panicked pretty decently in the car with my very very decent and chivalrous brave Viking boy toy!.... mean Date lol... No I was very very glad I had somebody with me at all honesty to help me through the experience it didn’t even last that long but because it just happened out of nowhere it was frightening there is just no other word that I can think of other than scary and frightening because it was paranormal and otherworldly and I just knew that even the fact that I knew that information without a shadow of a doubt was pregame creepy to be honest ,honest!
Lol so here ya GO LOL ya gets a newly beginning awakening medium , named Sarah DeRosier, from Columbia Missouri in your field of people now! And I am a huge jumpy scared cat of things that go bump in the night !
Yet I also ironically ADORE Dark Fantasy vs Light Fantasy! Have always seen my self on days in some ways a Goth Chic, I love dark wave music , and trance ! I am played probably more hours of vampire the masquerade and werewolf the apocalypse then it’s probably healthy for a young person that was in my early 20s I spent more time playing those games that I went out to bars and drink which was probably a better choice for me in the long run anyway!
When it comes to scary movies I am more into the older stuff black-and-white 40s 50s stuff like that or things that have to do with history! I think it’s grizzly and it’s gruesome as Jack the ripper is it has absolutely fascinated me to know and since I was literally probably 14 years old which is pretty morbid for teen. So I really got into movies such as her from hell and we really really enjoyed loving Penny dreadful when it came out because of how it was all about classic horror stories like Frankenstein and all my lovely favorites!
I’m really into monster movies and creature from the Black Lagoon is my all-time favorite I actually think the Blair witch Project is hilarious and actually it’s fairly freaking creepy at times too! I mean let’s be fair the camera is going everywhere and it’s mostly like a terrible carnival ride that you feel like you’re just gonna puke everywhere from oneside finally stops. But for independent film of the 90s with what they did the storyline was actually well done the acting was horrible it might’ve been a little overdone at times but horror movies what are you expect?
I guess when it comes down to it what I like about scary movies when I actually do watch them and I’m very very choosy about the ones I watch specially nowadays because if I wanna watch something to be scared then I’ll watch it to be scared if there’s going involved I’m fine with that!
What I am not however fine with is this obsession we have found yourselves in as a nation with Goreporn! Films now! I have never seen one of these films that people classify as this I’ve heard people tell me about them I will not ever ever see one I refused you I work in Medicine I don’t actually work in Medicine right now that’s a lie I intend on working in Medicine I am planning on getting my CNA hopefully by the first of next year and intend on going to classes for pre-nursing!
So I am not planning on being a stranger to blood guts and gore but this lets just make it ALLL. About the GORE OR ALL THE TORTURING thing goes on in movies it’s just gross and not showing a good side of humanity to me! ..... well that is if we are even willing to claim any sense of humanity in the new found genres of GOREPORN AND TORTUREPORN too me personally their none to had or found! That is the work of evil enties ONLY! ( or should be ! Spiritually and realistically from my Humble Young Female Pagan/Wiccan point of view) but it’s only mine alone I tilt hope I do not offend , for I certainly don’t wish it too !!!
Just when I hear about , I guess Saw , and Hostel come first off to mind! Having not visual and physically seen them, but from my minds eye have heard the Synopsis’s.
There utterly NO scare or horror factors to these films at all! It’s basically showing human being at their worst doing their worst ! In as much greasily gore filled detail as they can cram into two to three hours they can! That’s pretty much it! Or sit back and let see how long it take you!? Or your date to puke up that $14 popcorn SHE JUST HADDDDDD TO GET TONIGHT !
No for me I like Horror! Monster! Thrillers! Old and some new as well I don’t judge all just some!!! I actually loved the hell out of the IT movie lol I own part 2 and still have yet to find bloody time sit down an see it yet !
Now you might find it odd I guess I wrap up with my darknesses of self lol and of all things opinions on horror films of yester year and present is! The reason, mentioned so was for mostly two reasons was all!
  1. Lol what I do end up reading or watching as far genre of Horror is concerned is the same most people have for something like getting on a rollercoaster, or getting in an airplane and going sky diving ! Of bungee rope jumping ! I get a kick of of having lol short bursts of adderaline rushes every now and again!! Lol not to mention, if ya have a man, or women lol yes lgbtq ppl I am gonna say you could be here too lol I mean I am a bisexual 36 myself here! Lol ! But ANYWAY!! Lol wrapping one or both ur hand about your partner , during a scary movie of any sort! Let’s them know they are loved, cared for!, safe and protected as long YOU!!! THEIR LOVER ARE THERE!!! Lol
And let me real again ppl if ANY OF US! Young , old,single or married lol whatever want some kissy time, alone time with that movie date! That’s watching Netflix with ya in the lounge! Or your gal ya just went steady with, that ya went to take to the drive to see in FULL COLOR THE BLOOB!!! In your dads priceless reliable cherry apple red corvette , lol that gonna Bomp on down the road to Blueberry Hill for kiss and steam of Windows after the film of course!
Lol well either gen either time period or gotta whee you wanted to get with whom you were with ! So in conclusion of all that I watch Horror films for their cinemagaphic enjoyment , to be scared lol for adrenaline Rush fun purposes lol, and having fun, Romantic times with your loved one or ones lol.
But if all about me a dick and touturiing someone, or all about gore and gots ans grossness and that’s it! That’s a genre but saying or horror!? Is absurd and insulting !! Personally!
I am fairly sure some you could care less about all this! I simply take note of how easily I scare , at movies , or haunted houses things like this..... mentally in my mind. Right now , because I will have to face a very even more reality is now starting for me! All the thing lol at least by faith! Lol I knew to myself personally ! To be real and true are! But now that world is letting me see it ! Observe it! And I know VERY WELL INDEED ! I am sure too probably find , I would assume a type of doorway next!?
Or if not a doorway?! That exists by its self maybe find a way to draw one up and find a way to enter SAFELY ( and I would think most importantly also be able to exit as well and go ALWAYS have access to these while in the realm of the Medium! Or paranormal whatever it be lol sorry,.....)
Cause my elder taught me away to enter into the Astral and I Think possibly Elemental realms this way! For the purposes of meeting / greeting and being taught by my own personal Spirit Guides! He also made the VERY IMPORTANT ENDING STATEMENT OF THAT LESSON BEING!
“do not stay in their world, very long it can do damage to your body and more importantly , your mind can be damaged by being HERE TOO LONG!!!” And I am going to make a safe guess that this .... rule should just be followed for any inner , realms, Multi-verse, dimensional travel , lol or Tardis, Enterprise Star Fleet Ship, or other worldly travel ships AT ALL!!! PERIOD!! AND YEAH!!! I DO THINK THEY IS EXISTS😱🤗🛸🚀🛰🛡⚔️🔮🔱
Stay in or around places human beings or well I guess for us specifically I would think! Specifically Living human beings! Should not stay in , or be close or near by too! For too very long!! Just not Healthy for us! In a long term use anyway! I mean all of we can use and learn from and grow from! But this is not our home! And OFTEN WE CAN OFTEN BE ANYTHING! PREY, VICTEM, .... LIKE I SAID ANYTHING COULD BE THERE !!! GOOD OR BAD!!! Which is why I am here looking for new friends guidance !!! Of any type !!! Books, other groups!
I am just scared and afraid right now! But also excited as well! And am trying lol as best I can lol not sure how it’s goin to be honest.......... lmao But I am tryin VERY, VERY, VERY HARD TO BE BRAVE OF THIS NEW DARK (Shadowy) Unknown!
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2020.09.19 20:35 FunboyFrags Small back cottage studio, modern, peaceful, all utilities included

Furnished backyard cottage rendered in the (somewhat oxymoronic) modern Spanish colonial style for rent with a flexible start date. A secluded and relaxing oasis in the heart of central Los Angeles, this backyard studio features style and amenities rarely seen in the rental market.
The main living area has hardwood floors, crown molding, and double French doors leading outside.
The kitchenette features Caesarstone (polished quartz) countertops, subway tile backsplash and lots of cabinets. The appliances include a large refrigeratofreezer, gas range, oven, broiler, exhaust hood, and Insinkerator disposal. The bathroom also has a Caesarstone vanity, full tub and shower, and dual-flush water efficient toilet.
Amenities include: - 100-megabit wireless internet - Central heating and A/C with smart thermostat - Keyless entry- Low-energy LED canister lighting - Integrated USB wall charger - Tankless water heater - Extra storage space in the garage
Our neighborhood, West Adams, is literally the most central part of Los Angeles. If you take Metro, a 10-minute walk to the nearby Farmdale station will take you to Santa Monica, Culver City, or downtown LA with equal ease and speed. If you drive, there's fast access to the 10 at La Brea or Crenshaw. There's a public park with basketball courts and a playground about 5 minutes away.
Nearby shops and restaurants include Delicious Pizza, Alta, Bee Taqueria, Mizlala (Israeli), Sweet E's Bakery, Honeybee's House of Breakfast, Los Avayas, and the brand-new Johnny's Pastrami. Plus there's lots of eateries all along Crenshaw Ave, featuring some of LA's best soul food.
What are the cons?
- the place is small - think Holiday Inn Express - probably not good for anyone with a lot of stuff - the outside/yard is a wreck, but we're in the middle of redoing it - no laundry on-site (but there are several nearby laundromats)
What are the pros?
- it's private - we're cool - we have a lot of animals
This is an exceptional place to live and will require a rental application and a credit check. Finally, pets are a possibility, but yours must get along with our dog and multiple cats. Monthly rent is $1299 and includes all utilities (water, gas, electricity, trash and wireless internet).
(See original post at https://losangeles.craigslist.org/lac/apa/d/los-angeles-small-back-cottage-studio/7199213561.html for photos)
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2020.09.19 18:24 ranger_from_th_north [Online][MotW][UTC-6][18+][LGBTQIA+ Friendly] Experimental Twitch stream in development; Casting applications open! Looking for 3 to 4 cast members to play & GM! 2 days left to apply!

*Disclaimer\*
Before ANYTHING else, it should be known that our table supports women, peoples with disabilities, people who are gender non-conforming and the LGBTQIA+, Black, Indigenous and Minority communities. We are also supportive of freedom of religion or lack thereof. #BlackLivesMatter
-Now the post-
Hello there! My name is Saul (he/him) and we are TurnTables RPG! An experimental, role-playing stream in which we evoke the most oldest and noblest of sentiments: Sharing is caring.
This post is for the “Forever GMs.” For the players who want to GM but are nervous about world-building and becoming a “Forever GM.” This post is for the content creators who want to hone their storytelling and improv skills. This post is for the writers who wish to see their stories or characters be given a platform to be shared. This post is for those who want to expand their creativity and collaborate with like-minded individuals.
Explanation:
TurnTables RPG is a live-play RPG show that will stream on Twitch weekly. Because Monster of the Week by Michael Sands lends itself more to an episodic television format, that is the game we will begin the stream with. Later on we may have the time and resources to expand our content to other games such as Call of Cthulhu, Vampire: the Masquerade, other Powered by the Apocalypse games, Dungeons&Dragons and many more.
Currently our team consists of two producers and me. The stream will be made up of 4 to 5 cast members, including me. We, as a collective cast and crew, will be building this stream from the ground up.
In normal RPG fashion, each week will have the cast as their characters role-playing scenarios set forth by the GM of that week. The on-going story will then be handed off to a different cast member every week to GM, unless a two-shot is necessary.
Every GM will play and every player will GM. Therefore, the cast must be well-versed in the rules of MotW and have a character in order to play.
Before the stream goes live, the cast will come together to create their MotW characters. During that time, the cast will world-build together and establish the mythos/rules of the world.
Afterwards, a “showrunner” will be chosen for the upcoming season. The “showrunner” will be in charge of setting the premise for the season and being the first GM to kick off that season. Very much akin to television/streaming directors who write/direct weekly episodes in a series established by a showrunner, the other cast members will still be weekly GMs running their individualized stories within the premise set by the “showrunner”.
For the sake of time and clarity of vision, I will be the “show-runner” for the first season. However, the MotW world we play in will be the world the cast built together. The hope is that after the first season, the rest of the cast will feel comfortable enough with the format for one of them to take the reins as “showrunner” for the new season.
We are looking for enthusiastic players/GMs to join our stream’s cast.
Requirements:
*We want our table, our audience and our community to be a safe space and any actions/language that do not align with that will result in executive action by myself and the producers. *
Preferences:
Schedule:
*Some scheduling dates are subject to change depending on cast’s availability
*Play interview: applicants will be set up into randomized play groups, scheduled to meet over Discord video and will play a game of MotW run by myself. During that time applicants will be judged by a number of factors including but not limited to; their technical set up, their creative savvy and their improvisational skills.
Decisions made during the play interviews are not personal in any way and TurnTables RPG is dedicated to ensuring that the proper talent go to the proper project, so we ask that applicants who do not make it past the play interviews still be open to the possibility of later collaboration.
For the foreseeable future this stream will not be turning a profit. If, down the road, that reality changes then it will be a discussion amongst the cast & crew on how that will be distributed. For the time being, we want to start this stream and begin building a community around it.
TL;DR – We are TurnTables RPG, an experimental weekly RPG show streamed on Twitch. We are launching our inaugural Monster of the Week show and we are holding applications for 3 to 4 cast members. The cast members will be asked to both GM and play characters. Set within a world made collaboratively by the cast, the story will be handed off to a new GM weekly, who will run a session based within a pre-established premise. Please review the post for Requirements/Preferences. There is a question box within the Google Form application below. We look forward to hearing from you!

Application Link!
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2020.09.19 16:50 Christopher_Maxim I'm an office tech at a company that works with NASA. I should have never looked through their secret archive.

I don't work for NASA. I'm a lowly office tech at a company affiliated with NASA. We store data off-site mostly concerning their many, secret unmanned missions to the moon, including the countless ones that took place in between the Apollo launches. There are regular landings, even today. As you can imagine, we're not on the books. Still, we are a necessary facet of the space administration's delicate infrastructure.
Now that you're up to speed with where I work, I can tell you about the room. Room 371 to be precise; the overseer's office.
It always had an air of mystery about it. I, and other staff members, had been inside before; tasked with leaving behind flash drives filled with sensitive information for the overseer to upload to our database. You see, the sole computer in that room is an offline archive containing almost every one of NASA's dirty little secrets. Stuff that we can't risk getting out in the event of a data breach. If anyone were to hack our online mainframe, they would only find decoy files - outlying pieces of data that have already been in the public's eye.
Most of the information I dealt with amounted to mundane statistical analyses. The real interesting, controversial stuff was sent directly to the overseer, bypassing the prying eyes of entry-level employment.
That brings us to yesterday.
It was a normal drop-off assignment. Bring the flash-drive to Room 371, leave it on the desk, and shut the door on your way out. I had done it countless times before. This time, however, was a little different. After placing the drive on the desk, I noticed a faint glow on the wall behind it. The computer was on. This was strange. It was always shut down by the overseer after a data dump. The only times I had ever seen it turned on were days when he was in there, still working.
I admit, my curiosity got the better of me.
With a slight spike in adrenaline, I walked around the desk and sat at the chair, ready to take back at least one mystery to the hive-mind on the main floor.
The convenience in this moment cannot be understated. I later discovered that the overseer was sick and had rushed to the bathroom, where he remained for at least forty minutes. Not only was the computer on, but it was unlocked. Even our personal workstations required a series of passwords that changed, daily. Passwords we had to spend the first ten minutes of any given work day decrypting. This was the one and only chance I had to placate my curiosity and dig for the buried treasures of NASA. I knew there just had to be something in the confines of our database that would elicit a gasp or mouth drop. Something I would remember for the rest of my years.
In settling in at the desk, my heart pounding at the thought of the overseer's return, I noticed the computer was calibrated just like the rest of our PCs. Because of this, I knew just what folders to open and what digital stones to turn on my hunt for secrets. Most files were your run-of-the-mill storage vessels; data pertaining to the boring truths of the trade; statistics and physics predictions. After a few minutes of searching, I almost called it quits, but one document caught my eye. It was titled Project Burial at Sea. This was what I wanted. A classified NASA project, never before released to the public.
In this moment, secrets were revealed to me. Ones I soon wished I had never unearthed.
As is common with these types of documents, the jargon was very straight-forward and low on description. As such, I had to piece together bits of information to form a clear picture of the proposal and subsequent missions that apparently started at the turn of our current century. What I discovered did indeed elicit a gasp. It also made my skin crawl.
Project Burial at Sea was, ironically enough, a fail-safe against information leaks. It implemented the pre-existing infrastructure of NASA's unmanned missions to dispose of "cracks" in the system. That is, individuals likely to come clean about privileged information.
Yes, you heard right. Individuals. NASA was killing off would-be whistle blowers to protect their assets.
The initial proposal called for sending the bodies into deep space, but too many unknown variables presented themselves. If even one probe was knocked back to earth by an asteroid or unforeseen space event, the entire operation would be done for; especially if it landed in enemy territory. At that point, another country could use it to blackmail our government for aid and financial gain. Burying the bodies on the moon prevented this, and eliminated all potential evidence tying anyone to the crime. The people who vanished made up a very small portion of NASA, so the ratio of missing persons in relation to their workforce was barely disrupted, deflecting any potential suspicion.
After a rigorous sterilization procedure, the bodies are stuffed into the hollow spaces of the previously unmanned probes. Once they reach the lunar surface, they are collected by rovers (of which there are many more than you're aware of) and buried in the craters of a specific section of the moon's dark side. In other words, mass graves. The rovers later collect samples to determine the long-term effects of the soil on human decomposition. This was not the purpose of the project, just an added benefit.
I was floored. This document was not what I expected. I couldn't believe this sort of thing would happen in our country, and at NASA of all places, an organization I was involved with. After closing the file and navigating back to the home-screen, I left Room 371 and shut the door, my worldview shattered.
Upon returning to my workstation, my co-worker, Bill, questioned me.
"Jack, where were you? Did you hear the overseer retching in the bathroom? Poor guy has that stomach bug that's been going around."
I politely nodded but offered no response to the initial query, still shaken. Bill buried his face back in his work.
Eventually, the overseer returned, the sound of Room 371's creaky iron door slamming shut behind him as he resumed work at his desk. Beads of sweat formed above my brow as I wondered if he would notice something amiss and know I perused the archive. My heart began racing as the paranoia took hold. I had to tell someone about my discovery. Perhaps I misinterpreted the information. Maybe Bill could put my mind at ease. He was a nice guy. Not the type to break a promise or betray his fellow worker.
"Bill," I whispered, "Have you heard anything about NASA sending corpses to the moon?"
He stared at me a moment, an overly serious expression painted across his face. Then he laughed.
"Jack, you are a card. Where do you come up with this stuff, anyway? You should write a book."
Without so much as a sound to alert his arrival, the overseer put his hand on my shoulder. I nearly jumped out of my skin.
"Jack, I've been meaning to talk to you. A big promotion in the works. Meet me in my office in ten minutes."
With that, he loosened his grip and traveled back to Room 371. My eyes widened and my heart sank. Bill noticed something was wrong.
"What's wrong, Jack? You look as though you've seen a ghost. Promotions are a big deal around here. Only one every few months or so. Lisa was promoted last year and went on to supervise one of the unmanned probe launches. Haven't heard from her since."
I turned to Bill and met his gaze.
"Bill, it's been nice working with you."
He smiled before turning back to his computer.
"You too, Jack."
***
Ten, torturous minutes came and went. I hesitantly made my way to Room 371 and slowly opened the door. The overseer gestured for me to come in.
"Have a seat, Jack. And close the door."
I unwillingly obliged. The thought of making a run for it crossed my mind, but I knew the security detail at the front gate would stop me. Drawing attention to myself would only serve to expedite my demise.
"So... what is this about?" I asked, my breathing now labored and sporadic.
"Like I said before, it's a promotion. NASA is recruiting from its affiliate outfits to supervise some of their unmanned launches. You've been selected."
I tilted my head in disbelief.
"But sir, why me? I haven't done anything to warrant such a promotion, to my knowledge."
He grinned.
"That's where you're wrong, Jack. We've been watching you. We know what you did. You can't deny it any longer."
With a wicked smile, he stood up from his desk and walked over to me, his arms outstretched in my direction. His shadow covered the entire room. Or at least, it seemed that way in the moment. Without realizing it, I had backed myself into the corner, almost cowering in fear. That's when the door opened and my co-workers flooded the room.
"Surprise!"
I stood upright, shocked.
"What's going on?"
Bill responded.
"Don't you know what day it is, Jack?"
The overseer pointed at his wall calendar. It was September 18th, which according to them, was my hire date.
It all made sense now. It was a ruse. A practical joke at my expense. The overseer sometimes did this on workplace anniversaries - but not for many years at this point, and never to this elaborate extent. I didn't even realize what day it was until they pointed it out.
"Did you really think I would leave my computer on, unattended?"
Bill chimed in.
"Bodies can't even decompose on the moon, Jack. There's no air!"
They both let out hearty laughs. I laughed too, thoroughly relieved.
***
The rest of the afternoon was nice. After all was said and done, we returned to work, invigorated by the positive surge of energy and morale. After finishing my leftover tasks, I left with a smile on my face, happy to be earth-side, alive and well. This mood would follow me the whole way home, but it wasn't alone.
When I parked in my driveway, someone pulled in behind me. The overseer stepped out of the car and greeted me with a friendly wave.
"Jack, can we talk?"
House calls were unorthodox in our line of work, but not unheard of.
"Of course, Colter. Please come in."
He followed me inside and joined me in the living room. I sat down, but he paced at the fireplace, looking over my family photos on the mantle.
"You know, what Bill said was true. Bodies don't decompose on the moon. That bit was added by NASA. They put falsehoods in all of their classified documents. It's another fail-safe; a detail they can point to in the event of a leak to make it seem illegitimate."
I was utterly confused.
"I'm not sure I follow. What are you getting at, exactly?"
He turned to me, a stern look painted across his face.
"It's all real, Jack. The dead bodies, the craters; everything. You should have never sat at my desk."
I chuckled.
"Come on, Colter. The joke's over. No need to drag it out."
He wasn't laughing.
"This is no joke. You were hired in July, not September. I sent out a last-minute memo to everyone in an attempt to avert your suspicion. Here, we can discuss things privately."
"Very funny. You're forgetting about my wife and daughter."
A smirk touched the side of his cheek. He tossed me an envelope. Inside were photos of my wife picking up our daughter from school. My heart sank.
"What the hell is this, Colter? Are you following my family around?"
"We've intercepted them. Let's just say they'll be late getting home, tonight."
The gravity of the situation was beginning to sink in. If everything I saw was indeed real, then I was now a target. I would soon become the next NASA casualty buried at sea. If I didn't escape and get help, Charlotte and Leslie would never be saved.
My eyes darted for the door. Colter noticed.
"I wouldn't run if I were you. I didn't come alone."
My blood boiling, I was tempted to lash out in anger.
"Don't worry. They're safe."
I remained silent, but livid.
"There are things in the universe you can't begin to understand. Things not only above your pay-grade, but above your understanding. Things human words could never hope to describe."
"Human?" I asked, perplexed by the wording.
"Yes, Jack. Let me show you."
What happened next was enough to put my mouth on the floor.
Using his right hand and a single circular motion in the air, Colter opened up a portal. A fucking portal- one that seemed to connect my living room to the moon. I could even see Earth off in the distance.
"WHAT IN GOD'S NAME IS THAT?!" I shouted.
"Come, Jack. Get a closer look."
As his hostage, I had no choice but to humor his demands. Upon stepping up to the void, still frazzled, I saw it. A crater, filled to the brim with corpses.
"Why... why are you showing me this?" I asked in a shaky voice.
"Just watch, Jack."
I looked back to the scene and noticed something at the edge of the crater. Three, shadowy figures, far too tall to be human. They extended their arms and a glow rained down from the space above the crater.
The corpses... they moved.
I watched in horror as the bodies were re-animated- but these were not living things. They were shells controlled by a puppeteer, bent to its sinister will. The three shadows became one and formed an archway, a blinding brightness pouring out from within. One by one, the corpses walked into the light until, finally, the crater was emptied. Then, the light dissipated, and the shadows spun in unison, taking off at great speed into the abyss of deep space.
With another wave of his arm, Colter closed the portal. I was speechless.
"You see, Jack, Project Burial at Sea is more than a safety measure. It's a necessary sacrifice to them."
"So... all those bodies?" I asked.
"No, no. Only some were would-be whistle blowers. The rest; John and Jane Does, left at morgues across the country with no relatives to claim them."
"Where did they take them?" I asked.
"To the place where they live. There, they are forced to build. Stuck in the space between life and death for an eternity, slaves of an alien race. It's a truly terrible fate. We would all be there right now, if not for the deal we struck back in 1947. These creatures don't bode well in our atmosphere. We placate their every need to keep them from a developing a technology capable of mitigating the effect our air has on their bodies and spacecraft."
I couldn't believe it. Everything I knew up to that point was a lie.
Colter walked to the door.
"I like you, Jack. That's why I'm telling you all of this. I want to keep you on. You're a good man, and a good worker. If you don't want to end up like the poor souls up on that hunk of space rock, you'll keep your mouth shut."
I heard a car pull in outside.
"Looks like your wife and daughter are home. We just took them out for ice cream."
Before closing the door on his way out, the overseer turned back with a smile.
"See you on Monday, Jack."
submitted by Christopher_Maxim to nosleep [link] [comments]


2020.09.19 13:38 DoekaanET What your smash main says about you:

Mario: You easily suffer from choice paralysis and always make the most boring and default choice. Your favorite ice cream is vanilla, your favorite color is blue, your favorite animal is dog, and your favorite movie is The Godfather. If you were in Nazi Germany, you would 100% use the “just following orders” defense. You will go to Hell when you die. Inkling: Why don’t you have a seat? What were you planning when you came here tonight? King Dedede: You masturbate to Deviantart ironically. Meta Knight: You masturbate to Deviantart unironically. Peach: You’re the girlfriend of the guy who bought this game. You thought Link’s name was Zelda and Samus’ name was Metroid. After 15 minutes, you’re gonna want to go back to playing Mario Kart. Daisy: The same as Peach, except you’re a lesbian. Bayonetta: You have said “Rawr XD” at some point in your life, and use Facebook to post memes about depression. It’s getting impossible to tell where your stretch marks end and your self-harm scars begin. You are bisexual. Wolf: You are either currently 14 years old, or you were 14 years old when Brawl came out, and haven’t matured at all beyond that. You watch way too much anime, you’ll never improve as an artist, and your OTP sucks Corrin: You unironically own multiple anime figurines, a body pillow of your waifu, and a katana. You’re either a furry or have a shitty OC that’s half dragon, half demon, and half vampire. You either have autism or are just an oblivious asshole with no social skills, it’s hard to tell. Squirtle: You bought the Switch and this game on launch day. You threw a tantrum when Fox stopped showing Saturday morning cartoons. Your mom wishes you’d move out of the house. Ivysaur: You’ve got weird arm and back acne. You like to pretend you main all three of the Pokemon, but everyone can see right through you. You love cute animals, but if you ever tried to take care of one by yourself, it’d die in a week. Charizard: You are a basic ass bitch. You spent the first 5 matches spamming smash attacks and your side B. You’re the only one on this list who has gotten laid recently, but it doesn’t matter because you lasted a minute. Donkey Kong: You actually hate playing Smash, and everyone playing with you. You don’t play to win, you play to inspire the greatest amount of anger around you. You cannot go 48 hours without saying the N word. Hard R. Jigglypuff: You were born incomplete. Some piece of you is missing. Maybe it’s the part of your brain that dictates rational choice, or the part that controls empathy. Maybe it’s your impulse control. Maybe, just maybe, you were born without a soul. You started small, at first. Mice and squirrels, and then you grew bolder. Your neighbor’s cat had gotten outside. She would never find the poor thing. Your parents soon discovered what you did, and their punishments forced you to keep dormant your dark desires. You carried on with your life, feigning normalcy, a model student and son. That was until the day you met her. It was autumn, your first semester at college, your first time away from home. She stirred something in you. You took her out, flirted with her, bought her drinks, she was so pure and sweet, so trusting. You left with her, the intoxication swelling inside you both. She tripped, you caught her. You looked at her then. She was so beautiful, so alive. You cut her open. You cut her open because you had to know. Why was she so beautiful? How was she so alive? You cut and cut until she was no longer beautiful, no longer alive. You stared at what you had done, tears in your eyes, not from guilt or remorse, only the pure reflex, as though you knew you should cry, but didn’t understand why. When you came back down to a neutral calm, you disposed of the body, washed yourself of any and all evidence. You knew the first thing you needed to do was establish an alibi. You called up your roommate: “Hey” you said “Wanna hang out tonight?” Your roommate replied “Sure, my friend brought over his Switch, we’re gonna play Smash Ultimate.” You smiled, licking the final traces of viscera from your teeth, and said “Great, I’ll be there in 10.” Kirby: You are Masahiro Sakurai, desperately trying to convince everybody that your favorite boy is best. Put Mappy in the game you fucking cunt. Lucina: You are the comedic straightman of your group. You go through life with two moods, neutrality or exasperation at your louder, more fun friends. Your spirit animal is Squidward and, like Squidward, you are the top sad boy. At least your cats love you. Chrom: You’re the mouthbreathing kind of weeb. You have objectively bad taste. You either want Goku and Sora in Smash, or you want the entire roster replaced with other characters from Fire Emblem. Little Mac: You have a 2 digit IQ, and managing air combat is too much for you. You have eaten at least three Joycons since you started playing Smash. Your go-to excuses for losing are bad recovery moves and the helmet you’re forced to wear falling in front of your eyes. Robin: You have LARPed before. Ironically, considering the game your main comes from, your best friend is a Chrom main. You honestly can do better than hanging out with them, but then you’d have to find a new 4th for your D&D group. Sonic: You’re just a sad person. Either because you’ve got the specific kind of autism that develops in fans of Sonic the Hedgehog, or because you’ll inevitably be lumped in with those people. You know deep down the speed isn’t worth the pain you feel inside. You ask yourself why you keep playing, but you can never come to an answer. You can’t outrun your problems, Sonic main. Pichu: You didn’t know that your attacks did damage to you until someone pointed it out to you, and you didn’t want to look like an idiot, so you pretended like you knew that. In a panic, you came up with some lie about how Pichu is actually really good, and now you’re just sorta stuck with it. Pikachu: You are the boyfriend of a Peach main. You don’t actually like playing Pikachu that much, it’s just that whenever she gets bored playing, she’ll just sit and watch you play, but demand you play as Pikachu because “it’s so cute.” Even when you’re playing with your friends, and you really want to win, you curse yourself and choose Pikachu. Ness: You love Earthbound. You have also never played Earthbound, you just know it by reputation. You also love Undertale, and you probably voted it as game of the year when it came out. You like to think you’re really skilled at Ness, but when things get too hard, you just spam PK Fire and the baseball bat. You’re not impressing anyone. Fox: You played Smash Ultimate for 5 minutes, saw all the items and stages, got mad, and went back to Melee. You’re currently waiting for the Project M version of Ultimate. You get the saltiest out of everyone on the list. You have told someone who doesn’t like Dark Souls to git gud. Duck Hunt: You’re like a Donkey Kong main without the hate, or a Jigglypuff main without the urge to kill. When the Duck Hunt dog laughs at someone for not shooting all the ducks, you feel that on spiritual level. You are probably the happiest person on this list, which makes other people angry, and in turn, only makes you happier. Zelda: You secretly crossdress and are ashamed of it. Within 5 years, you’ll gradually become more and more comfortable with it, until you eventually become a really obnoxious drag queen. Like, the kind that only watches Ru Paul’s Drag Race and nothing else. Regardless, you spam Din’s Fire like a motherfucker, just like everyone else who plays Zelda. Link: You’re boring and suck ass. You play as Oddjob in Goldeneye and use the rocket launcher in Halo. There’s a good chance you’re the least skilled player on the list and don’t even know it. Your favorite skin is the Dark Link skin, because of course it fucking is. R.O.B: You have a video game collection that’s about the cost of a mortgage. You have at least 6 or 7 Game Gears, a fully functional arcade cabinet, and a R.O.B which you brag about whenever you play Smash with new people. If you could have one wish, it would be to work for Nintendo. Snake: You think gamers are the most oppressed minority, and the reason for why Quiet from MGSV is half-naked makes total sense and is genius writing. You respond to news stories about black criminals with something racist, and then cite average IQ scores to defend yourself. If there’s a comment section attached to this list, you’ll leave an angry comment about being called racist. Bowser: You’re a divorced dad in your 40s who bought a Switch to try to win your son’s affections for when he comes over on alternating weekends. You picked Bowser because you thought it would be cute to do Team Smash with him as Bowser and Bowser Jr., but whenever your kid comes over, he only ever plays something called Fortnite. You tried it out, and it was too scary and confusing, so now you just drink and play Smash because at least you recognize the characters. Your ex’s new husband is a better and more attentive lover than you ever will be. Mewtwo: Unlocking Mewtwo in Melee by spending a total of 20 hours in VS matches was the greatest accomplishment of your sad, pathetic life. Conversely, Mewtwo being replaced by Lucario in Brawl was the worst tragedy you have ever experienced. You got the Smash 4 DLC just to bring some meaning back into your life. Out of all the Pokemon mains, you are the only one who is still an avid Pokemon player. You are the most likely person on this list to kill yourself. Ike: You totally go to the gym all the time and drink all those protein shakes. For reals though this faggot is a slow faggot who couldn’t air recover if his life depended on it. Honest to god you might as well just admit your a fagot who just wants to pretend he’s Guts so you can make your peepee big. Or better yet you circlejerk on smashbros about how much Sakurai is biased. Captain Falcon: Loudest player on the list. Will scream Captain Falcon quotes and be one of the most frequent taunters. Is retarded, but only for attention. If anyone in the list is drunk right now, it’s you. If you get a KO with Falcon Punch, you will never shut the fuck up about it. Incineroar: You’re 10. You only picked this character because you picked Litten in Pokemon Sun or Moon. You only picked Litten because it was the Fire starter and you thought Fire was cooler than Grass or Water. Even you think it’s dumb that one of Incineroar’s special moves is a counter. You will either pick a different main or lose all of your friends. Simon: You are roughly 40 years old and racist. Not as racist as the Snake main, but still racist. The “deus vult” kind of racist. Despite this, you have a thing for Asian chicks. You have thought about joining the military at some point. You have unironically used the term “alpha” to describe yourself. Lucario: 75% chance you’re a furry. 20% chance you were a Mewtwo main in Melee and had to make do with Lucario in Brawl. 5% chance you’re really holding out for Goku to be in Smash, and play Lucario because he plays closest to how you imagine Goku would play. Ridley: You are an incredible piece of shit. Now that Ridley is in Smash, the new top characters on your wishlist are Master Hand and Master Chief. You don’t care about balance or thematic consistency, winning or losing, you are simply here to disrupt. You quit the game whenever you’re about to lose. Mr. Game and Watch: Shut the fuck up. You don’t main Mr. Game and Watch. Nobody mains Mr. Game and Watch. You spam B and then do side B whenever somebody gets too close. You first learned about the Game and Watch from Melee just like the rest of us. You’re not special. You’re NOTHING. Pit: You mained him in Brawl back when he was OP, and since he’s been nerfed, all you do is sit in the corner, spamming projectiles and the occasional side B when somebody gets too close. If the match has more than two players, you will guaranteed be the first to die. Wario: The most graceful winner on the list, which is faint praise, because they’re among the saddest in real life. They know they’re pathetic though, and that’s why they don’t get angry about losing. Will either kill themselves one day or die of a heart attack by age 50. Lucas: Even moreso than Ness mains, lies about playing the Mother games. Will do nothing but PK Freeze and PK Thunder. Will never, ever win, and will only ever cost you a victory. If they do manage to win, you’ve either found the top 1% of Smash players, or you’ve started the apocalypse. Ice Climbers: Like Duck Hunt mains, except you aren’t trying to troll anyone intentionally. You will forget how annoying your specials can be right up until after you’ve hit someone with them. Nobody is happy when you win, and you are definitely the least happy out of everyone. You just want everyone to get along. Don’t be such a damn pussy, pussy, you a damn pussy. Villager: You suck ass, but you’re the only one who doesn’t know it. You think Villager is better than he actually is, and you overemphasize how creepy he looks. You are the kind of person who thinks button mashing is a strategy, and that having having no strategy counts as “mind games.” You like creepypastas way too much. Mega Man: You are the least likely person on the list to have had sex, which is good because there’s a 50% chance you’re into little boys. You are also the person on the list who has played an NES game most recently. You complain about the number of characters with swords in the game, but it’s secretly because any decent player who mains one can beat you easily. Will sing along to the theme music whenever on the Wily’s Castle stage. Samus: You are the only one on the list who actively wants all items on. You alternate between spamming your charge shot, and spamming your grab. If you’re good, you will always get first. If not, you will always die first and bitch about it. Nobody knows who invited you over, but everyone secretly wishes you weren’t here. Dark Samus: You mained Samus and always picked her dark suit skin before Ultimate. Not even you asked for this character to be in Smash, and even you couldn’t really explain how they’re different from Dark Samus. When you tell someone you play Smash and they ask who your main is, you forget Dark Samus exists for a minute before telling them. Yoshi: There’s a 50% chance you are an actual child. If you’re not a child, then you either only play Smash for fun, or you are the best player on the list. Either way, it makes you among the saddest people on the list. You’re a good sport for the entire game, right up until you win by spitting them out as an egg right on the edge of the map. Wii Fit Trainer: You’re not actually good at Smash, you’re just good at improvising. You’re playing the game on the fly and just so happen to be lucking out every time you use the volley ball. There is a bone in your brain that compels you to yell “SALUTE THE SUN!” at least once per game. You definitely want to fuck the Wii Fit Trainer. Luigi: You are a down-to-earth, lovable loser who thinks Mario is too normal or obvious a choice. You legitimately find Luigi’s moves and animations to be funny and probably still laugh at Adam Sandler movies. Whenever you win a game, you take forever to press start just because you want to watch his victory pose for as long as possible. If you ever win with the kick taunt, then everybody you know literally hates you. Sheik: You are on both the LGBT and autism spectrums. You also have a Tumblr account. You met all of your friends online and have never talked to them in real life. You are unable to talk and play at the same time. You are probably really good at the game, but are still a sore loser, and will likely be the first to rage quit. Dr. Mario: You are a hipster that only picked Dr. Mario becomes nobody mains him. You pretend like you’ve always mained him, even though you used to main Link, and thought “why the fuck is Dr. Mario a character” when you saw him in Melee, just like the rest of us. You think it’s really cool that his side smash has lightning coming out of his hand but will never admit it. Richter: You embody all the negative traits of a Simon main, except you’re half as old and not OPENLY racist. Instead, you’re just really into metal and think you’re way more badass than you actually are. You own a Punisher t-shirt and have taken a picture of yourself posing with an assault rifle. You have the smallest dick out of everyone on the list. Diddy Kong: Your play style is the strategic equivalent of an infant slapping at a control. You will use the same move over an over again until it stops being effective, at which point you simply move onto a new one. You are the worst person to lose to. You will wake up one day realizing everybody hates you and not know why. This. This is why. Cloud: You only picked Cloud because you were excited to see him get added to Smash. You also will freely admit that fact with no shame whatsoever. You are the Chrom main’s only other friend besides the Robin main. You both bond over your love of anime boys and desire for Sora to be playable in Smash. You are easily the gayest player on the list. Mii Fighters: Either you’re playing as your actual Mii, in which case you have the lowest functioning level of autism on the list and are taking the game seriously, or you’re playing as a joke Mii, in which case you are guaranteed to have a fun time. It doesn’t matter either way, because you’ve never won a single game of Smash in your entire life. Roy: You’re like the Marth main, except you were also the kind of kid who had serious anger issues and screamed swear words at people in class when you were mad. You picked Roy over Marth because his special moves had fire. If Snake were playable in Melee, you would’ve picked him as your main. Olimar: You are the only person on the list who has ever played one of the Pikmin games all the way through. You are an eldritch abomination whose schemes and machinations are unknowable by man. You are the only one boring enough to pay attention to damage types. The ultimate irony of your playstyle is that you will die alone. Greninja: You are also 10. Your best friend is the Incineroar main, at least for now. If you don’t currently watch Naruto, you’re going to get way too into it very soon. You will make excuses and get salty every time you get hit, but you will brag and act like you’re the ultimate chessmaster every time you land a hit. You insist on playing with Final Smashes and no other items. Dark Pit: You’re right in the middle of a venn diagram between Ike main and Greninja main. You’re 13 years old. Everything you do and think is cool right now, you will look back on with embarrassment when in 5 years time. Unless you have actual autism, in which case you’ll never have a moment of self-realization. Instead, you’ll make really bad fan art of your favorite video game and cartoon characters. Ignorance is bliss. Toon Link: You are only the tiniest bit better than the Link main, and yet inexplicably aren’t nearly as hated as them. Lying comes as easily to you as breathing, and you do so without any semblance of guilt. You have a career in politics, Palutena: You pick your main in every game based on waifu status, and your playstyle is finding one combo you like and spamming it repeatedly. You play Skyrim with a mod that lets you play as a big-titted anime lady. You say you prefer subtitled anime to English dubs, but you actually don’t. Your taste in music is shit. Ryu: You’re insecure about playing a kid’s game and refuse to play as any characters that are cartoony, female, or a prettyboy. You won’t ever actually buy a Switch, because Nintendo is for babies, but you’ll still play it with your bros, because you’re the guy who calls people “bro.” You’re only playing as Ryu until they put in Goku or Master Chief. Ken: You’re confused about your sexuality and compensate for it by making overtly sexual statements and calling them jokes. You probably shit talk the most out of everyone else playing. You go to the gym just so you can talk about going to the gym. Bowser Jr. You’re one of the biggest Nintendo fanboys on the list, and got really excited when you saw that all of the other skins for Bowser Jr. were the Koopalings. You pretend like you know all of their names, but there’s always 1 or 2 that you keep forgetting. You can see what they look like in your mind but you can’t remember their name. You know they were all named after different musicians, but that doesn’t help you remember their names, because you know even less about the musicians than you do the characters, because the only thing you’re really knowledgeable about is pointless minutia about video games, and even now you’re proving how little impact that knowledge has on your life. If Nintendo did an NES Classic type deal for the N64 or the Gamecube, you would pay thousands of dollars for them, even though you’ve already got both consoles. Isabelle: You’re a mom that doesn’t actually play video games, you’re just doing this because your kid wanted somebody to play with. You picked the dog because she was cute. You’re either accidentally too good at the game, kick your kid’s ass, and make them cry, or you suck so hard that you’re actually less fun to fight against than the CPU. In 3 years, your kid will have moved on to FPS’ and you’ll look back on Smash with a mix of nostalgia and sadness, because your kid doesn’t want to play with you any more. You read James Patterson books, love win, and masturbate in the shower. Rosalina & Luma: You play the piano, harvest bull semen, or do something else outside of video games that requires two hands. You’re also big into RTS games. Something about controlling legions of forces, sending hundreds to their deaths, having so much power at your disposal awakens something deep inside of you. Even you leave off the “& Luma” part when talking about the character. Young Link: You are the token girl of a group of guys. Every single one of them wants to fuck you because you’re an average-looking girl who likes video games. You will be oblivious to all of it, and date some guy outside of your friend group. Half of them will start to resent you. All of them will be waiting for the opportunity to catch you at a vulnerable moment and have a one night stand with you. It will inevitably happen. It will be with the least shit guy of the group (which isn’t saying much) and ruin most of your interpersonal relationships. You also spend way too much money at conventions. Ganondorf: You are also the token girl of a group of guys, but you’re also a fat, butch lesbian. You try way too hard to be one of the guys, chug beers even though everybody else is drinking like normal, and you very blatantly burp and fart. You will continue to act like this into your 40s at which point your hair will be gray and permanently styled in a faux hawk. Despite all this, you will have the hottest wife out of everyone on this list. Zero Suit Samus: You picked her so you could play as her two-piece skin and masturbate with the screen paused, didn’t you? King K. Rool: You were the kind of kid who ate paste and would always demand first choice of characters because it was your birthday. You use the most OP options in any game but will say that something is unfair when it beats you. The only reason we’re letting you play with us is because mom says have to, and you’ll tell on us if we don’t. Shulk: You have an annoying voice. You don’t eat gluten, even though you don’t have any food allergies. You think all FPS games are stupid except for Overwatch. You use Tumblr slang in real life and have to ship every fictional character you come across. You’ve cried more recently than anyone else on the list, and you literally can’t even right now. Falco: You’re like a Fox main with less autism. In some ways, however, you are much worse than them. When you aren’t using Falco’s blaster to make enemies flinch, you’re telling women to kill themselves on the Internet. You are the guy who goes to the bar to go after women with low self-esteem. You definitely yell the N word during heated gaming moments. Pac-Man: You are the antithesis of the Mario main, and the type of person who always want to have new “experiences.” You will date a teenager and defend it to your friends by saying “age is just a number.” You also cheat on your partners and then act like you were the victim because you were “suffocating” by being expected to be monogamous. Your favorite food is some weird kind of pizza or burger that’s named after an Arcade Fire song and only available at a local restaurant whose name is a pun. Piranha Plant: Some men aren’t looking for anything logical, like money. They can’t be bought, bullied, reasoned, or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn. Joker: You decided you would main this character before you ever played them because you love JRPGs so much. You say “u mad bro?” to annoy people even though you have the worst anger management of anyone on the list. You unironically liked the game “Hatred” and will switch to Doomguy if he gets put in Smash. Random: You’re pretty cool.
submitted by DoekaanET to copypasta [link] [comments]


2020.09.19 10:39 Busy_Resource Can people please say if this is abuse

Basically this is a list i compiled over about a month about things my Nparents did. i’ve showed it to my therapist and they did nothing. I’m starting to think i’m crazy. could people please outline what is abuse, and what type of you could. i will be eternally grateful. thanks in advance
————————————————————————-
1 - came in yelling at me to get up after i had just finished school, caused me to have an anxiety attack, followed me, cornered me, started yelling, recorded me, randall then came and started aswell, got a lecture and rubbed our “agreement” in my face whilst me still hyperventilating, also mocked me for taking my valium for which i am prescribed for this exact reason
2- placing blame on me for everything
3- said she basically had depression because she had a migraine condition
4- you refuse to go on any medication, i’m legit on 3
5- you refuse to see anyone - seen that many people
6- you always yell at me i never yell at you- first of all only do that when you come at me hard or are following me cornering me whilst i’m having an anxiety attack - 2 you’re yelling right now, and you yell all the time
7- i’m allowed to touch you whenever i want
8- trying to guilt trip me - i never sleep anymore because of you
9- after 30 minutes of shaming me for my cuts and me telling them to stop body shaming me - don’t you ever use that bullshit ever again
10- people who cut are piss weak
11- if you don’t cut your hair you’re getting kicked out
12 don’t turn this on us - the body shaming
13 after both coming at me - your brother and sister don’t need this
14 you’re just paranoid
15 you’re making me spend all this money on you for these psychologists and you never accept the treatment - literally done nothing but that
16 - planting seeds of doubt about my aunty being there for me; telling me that she won’t be there when i need her
17 - telling me no one cares about me only my parents; i don’t believe that
18 - bragging about being the best person ever
19 - accusing me of not being honest constantly
20- telling me i don’t know everything because i said i know what valium is
21- not leaving me alone when request multiple times
22 - threatening to go into my phone records
23- telling me to go and live somewhere else (knowing that i don’t have anywhere)
24 - telling me that i’m crazy
25 - invalidating my trauma
26 - threatening to move my schools
27- yelling at me
28 - lecturing me and planting doubt in my mind about how “2 girls” at my mums old school spoke up about sexual abuse and the police investigated “and found nothing”
29 - “miserable piece of shit” - father - prior date
30- constantly calling me disrespectful for “talking over them” despite me being the one speaking first and then taking over me
31 - constantly being told “your not the boss of the house I am” by both parents, despite me not mentioning it once
32 - “your life isn’t that hard”
33- “you’re so ungrateful” constantly reminded even though i never do anything to show this
34- my mum exposing to her friends my deepest secret - my mental illness
35 - constantly calling me “mate” despite me clearly stating that it infuriates me
36 - constant lecturing over trivial matters
37 - kicked me out for a night
38 - constant threats to kick me out, send me to a public school away from all of my friends
39 - “if you don’t get out of this bed right now i’m picking you up and throwing you out the door” - father
40- shaming me about my self harm scars
41 - holding tightly against my will whilst having a severe anxiety attack despite me yelling at her to let go
42 -telling me i’m the problem not them
43- nothing is ever their fault
44- telling me that i’m the abuser
45 - telling me that i’m not even trying to fight depression
46- respect is demanded despite none being returned
47- threatening to take phone and laptop
48- those doctors don’t know what they’re talking about... i was a nurse for 20 years despite having a significantly lower education than them
49- speaking over the top of me
50- “do you think you’re smarter than me? i have a masters degree” despite me never bringing up intelligence
51- you’re a disgrace
52- invading personal space
53- coming extremely close to me, pointing fingers in face
54- yelling
55- anything said that doesn’t agree with them i am automatically being disrespectful
56- calling me a sook
57- constant criticism
58- considered demanding and entitled as I “only” thank them for doing what they are legally obliged to do
59- questioning me intensely for information so that they can use it to manipulate me
60- calling me selfish
61- telling me i’m not the only person in the family even though i tell them to leave me alone
62- manipulated by instilling fear into me such as threat of being kicked out or moved schools, to get what they want
63- also manipulated by coming into my personal space, making me extremely anxious and agitated and not leaving until their demands are met
64- responding to a threat by telling them that they can’t legally do that brings on being called disrespectful, ungrateful, entitled and the intelligence suggestions
65- their opinions and feelings trump anyone else’s in their opinion
66- accusations of me being a psychopath due to lack of empathy towards them - quite ironic
67- got told that i’m ruining everyone’s lives with my “shit” and that they have better things to do
68- my complete loss of appetite which they are fully aware of is considered as me being ungrateful and selfish
69- it’s the end of the world whenever randall or mandy have a physical ailment, yet my severe depression is just me being moody and something that i can snap out of and something that i choose to be like
70- parents, despite having no university training in the field of medicine know better than experienced doctors, psychologists and psychiatrists
71- their 0 years in the field of medicine and psychiatry is somehow greater than the many years which all my doctors have
72- “i’m raising you so that you can function in society and that you can live in a family”
73- constant rule making and changing to gain a sense of control
74- deep offence is taken to any truth that is told, followed by rage
75- saying i’m making them feel like a stranger in their own home, seeking sympathy, playing the victim card
76- made me feel even guilty and shameful about my cuts
77-
recording me (whilst trying to hide it( on multiple occasions
78- took school laptop “to test internet speed” definitely tampered or searched lap top as the speed could’ve been tested on any device
79- threatening to take bedroom door off
80- “if you don’t like it here u can go and jump in front of a train”
81- manipulating me to force me into unfair “agreements” through playing with my emotions
82- you better go and tell the truth or you better watch out - what do you think i’ve done this entire tome
83- pushing down my door, tackling me to the ground, physically restraining me against my will, cutting up my favourite jumper, forcing me to go to the ED for “my sake” more like to soothe their issues also can’t see what’s wrong with that
84- you better tell the truth or i’ll know
85- making appointments without my knowledge and then bringing them up on me without any notice
86- calling doctors behind my back to make up and cast accusations
87- “you have no reason to be angry”
88- “i’ve had anxiety myself so i know what you’re going through” - complete lie, anyone who actually had anxiety would clearly be able to see what wrong with physically restraining someone whilst they are having an anxiety attack, they also wouldn’t keep on attacking the person having an anxiety attack despite pleading for them to leave the person alone
89- “you don’t even try to fight it” - symptoms
90- lying about telling everyone about my depression
91-
constantly being told i’m being selfish despite wanting to be left alone
92- cornering me in my room and other rooms so that they can manipulate me into getting what they want
93- telling me that i’m “fucking my whole life up” by self harming and that it’s what crazy people do
94- not allowing me to go to my auntys despite me trying to make the bigger person move and then being called selfish
95- telling me that i have no friends and that no one really likes me
96- not picking up my prescription of valium for a week but giving me her person supply daily - i suspect to maintain control, to use it over me or to be able to withhold the medication
97- “i thought you were smart” said whenever i oppose a view of theirs
98- grabbed me by my jumper and pulled me out of bed- ripping the jumper up at the seams, which was brand new
99- blatant lying - said she didn’t tell anyone about me seeing a psychologist/psychiatrist as well as my anxiety and depression when i literally saw a message asking if Ann knew any for my depression. many other instances
100- you blame everything on everyone else - first of all never said i didn’t and i don’t
101- you can leave now but you won’t get anywhere in life
102- so are you proud of those cuts or something
103- are you going to be wearing them with pride
104- stop trying to be an emo
105- if you don’t stop that cutting you’re getting sent to lowanna
106- i’m the voice and reason and calm - whilst yelling at me and telling me that i’m getting kicked out if i don’t fix what’s wrong
107- go and try make it on your own if your so smart you won’t be able to - literally said nothing
108- “we have never done anything”
109- “you can go and live on youth allowance and see how you like that”
110- cornering me on multiple occasions
111- telling me i don’t think properly
112- telling me my mind is telling me things
113- essentially calling me crazy causing me to question my sanity multiple times a day
114- forcing me to relive the traumatic nights on multiple occasions
115- basically daring me to go to the police with everything
Edit- i added numbers
submitted by Busy_Resource to raisedbynarcissists [link] [comments]


2020.09.19 10:34 Busy_Resource (TW: Abuse) can people please tell me if this is abuse

I showed all this to my therapist and they legit said nothing. i’m starting to think i’m crazy. both my parents are narcissistic. thanks in advance
came in yelling at me to get up after i had just finished school, caused me to have an anxiety attack, followed me, cornered me, started yelling, recorded me, my father then came and started aswell, got a lecture and rubbed our “agreement” in my face whilst me still hyperventilating, also mocked me for taking my valium for which i am prescribed for this exact reason
placing blame on me for everything
said she basically had depression because she had a migraine condition
you refuse to go on any medication, i’m legit on 3
you refuse to see anyone - seen that many people
you always yell at me i never yell at you- first of all only do that when you come at me hard or are following me cornering me whilst i’m having an anxiety attack - 2 you’re yelling right now, and you yell all the time
i’m allowed to touch you whenever i want
trying to guilt trip me - i never sleep anymore because of you
after 30 minutes of shaming me for my cuts and me telling them to stop body shaming me - don’t you ever use that bullshit ever again
people who cut are piss weak
if you don’t cut your hair you’re getting kicked out
don’t turn this on us - the body shaming
after both coming at me - your brother and sister don’t need this
you’re just paranoid
you’re making me spend all this money on you for these psychologists and you never accept the treatment - literally done nothing but that
“miserable piece of shit” - father - prior date
constantly calling me disrespectful for “talking over them” despite me being the one speaking first and then taking over me
constantly being told “your not the boss of the house I am” by both parents, despite me not mentioning it once
“your life isn’t that hard”
“you’re so ungrateful” constantly reminded even though i never do anything to show this
my mum exposing to her friends my deepest secret - my mental illness
constantly calling me “mate” despite me clearly stating that it infuriates me
constant lecturing over trivial matters
kicked me out for a night
constant threats to kick me out, send me to a public school away from all of my friends
“if you don’t get out of this bed right now i’m picking you up and throwing you out the door” - father
shaming me about my self harm scars
holding tightly whilst having a severe anxiety attack despite me yelling at her to let go
telling me i’m the problem not them
nothing is ever their fault
never apologising
telling me that i’m the abuser
telling me that i’m not even trying to fight depression
respect is demanded despite none being returned
threatening to take phone and laptop
those doctors don’t know what they’re talking about... i was a nurse for 20 years despite having a significantly lower education than them
speaking over the top of me
“do you think you’re smarter than me? i have a masters degree” despite me never bringing up intelligence
you’re a disgrace
invading personal space
coming extremely close to me, pointing fingers in face
yelling
anything said that doesn’t agree with them i am automatically being disrespectful
calling me a sook
constant criticism
considered demanding and entitled as I “only” thank them for doing what they are legally obliged to do
questioning me intensely for information so that they can use it to manipulate me
calling me selfish
telling me i’m not the only person in the family even though i tell them to leave me alone
manipulated by instilling fear into me such as threat of being kicked out or moved schools, to get what they want
also manipulated by coming into my personal space, making me extremely anxious and agitated and not leaving until their demands are met
responding to a threat by telling them that they can’t legally do that brings on being called disrespectful, ungrateful, entitled and the intelligence suggestions
their opinions and feelings trump anyone else’s in their opinion
accusations of me being a psychopath due to lack of empathy towards them - quite ironic
got told that i’m ruining everyone’s lives with my “shit” and that they have better things to do
my complete loss of appetite which they are fully aware of is considered as me being ungrateful and selfish
it’s the end of the world whenever randall or mandy have a physical ailment, yet my severe depression is just me being moody and something that i can snap out of and something that i choose to be like
parents, despite having no university training in the field of medicine know better than experienced doctors, psychologists and psychiatrists
their 0 years in the field of medicine and psychiatry is somehow greater than the many years which all my doctors have
“i’m raising you so that you can function in society and that you can live in a family”
constant rule making and changing to gain a sense of control
deep offence is taken to any truth that is told, followed by rage
saying i’m making them feel like a stranger in their own home, seeking sympathy, playing the victim card
made me feel even guilty and shameful about my cuts
lying
recording me (whilst trying to hide it( on multiple occasions
took school laptop “to test internet speed” definitely tampered or searched lap top as the speed could’ve been tested on any device
threatening to take bedroom door off
“if you don’t like it here u can go and jump in front of a train”
manipulating me to force me into unfair “agreements” through playing with my emotions
you better go and tell the truth or you better watch out - what do you think i’ve done this entire tome
pushing down my door, tackling me to the ground, physically restraining me against my will, cutting up my favourite jumper, forcing me to go to the ED for “my sake” more like to soothe their issues also can’t see what’s wrong with that
you better tell the truth or i’ll know
making appointments without my knowledge and then bringing them up on me without any notice
calling doctors behind my back to make up and cast accusations
“you have no reason to be angry”
“i’ve had anxiety myself so i know what you’re going through” - complete lie, anyone who actually had anxiety would clearly be able to see what wrong with physically restraining someone whilst they are having an anxiety attack, they also wouldn’t keep on attacking the person having an anxiety attack despite pleading for them to leave the person alone
“you don’t even try to fight it” - symptoms
lying about telling everyone about my depression
constantly being told i’m being selfish despite wanting to be left alone
cornering me in my room and other rooms so that they can manipulate me into getting what they want
telling me that i’m “fucking my whole life up” by self harming and that it’s what crazy people do
not allowing me to go to my auntys despite me trying to make the bigger person move and then being called selfish
telling me that i have no friends and that no one really likes me
not picking up my prescription of valium for a week but giving me her person supply daily - i suspect to maintain control, to use it over me or to be able to withhold the medication
“i thought you were smart” said whenever i oppose a view of theirs
grabbed me by my jumper and pulled me out of bed- ripping the jumper up at the seams, which was brand new
blatant lying - said she didn’t tell anyone about me seeing a psychologist/psychiatrist as well as my anxiety and depression when i literally saw a message asking if Ann knew any for my depression. many other instances
you blame everything on everyone else - first of all never said i didn’t and i don’t
you can leave now but you won’t get anywhere in life
so are you proud of those cuts or something
are you going to be wearing them with pride
stop trying to be an emo
if you don’t stop that cutting you’re getting sent to lowanna
i’m the voice and reason and calm - whilst yelling at me and telling me that i’m getting kicked out if i don’t fix what’s wrong
go and try make it on your own if your so smart you won’t be able to - literally said nothing
“we have never done anything”
“you can go and live on youth allowance and see how you like that”
cornering me on multiple occasions
telling me i don’t think properly
telling me my mind is telling me things
essentially calling me crazy causing me to question my sanity multiple times a day
forcing me to relive the traumatic nights on multiple occasions
basically daring me to go to the police with everything
submitted by Busy_Resource to abusiveparents [link] [comments]


2020.09.19 09:31 Ofladrit “Flash Girl” by Confused Ed (May 2000)

ANNOUNCER: “It‘s 3:30 Eastern Standard Time… and we all know what comes on then… THAT’S RIGHT… everyone’s favorite super heroine… FLASH GIRL.
Yes, friends, Flash Girl. At day, she poses as mild mannered Alice Krumbabble, a quiet Librarian. But when night falls, she dons her latex costume and uses her super ability to move 20 times faster than even the fastest mortal to battle crime and the forces of evil! Let’s watch to see what exciting adventures occur in this episode.”
SCENE: Flash Girl is poised on top of a rooftop looking down with binoculars.
Flash Girl is a knockout 25-year-old, at 5’4”, blue eyes, soft red hair down to her shoulders, 125 lbs., with size 36C cups that you can see clearly in her skintight red and black suit. Her legs are her most impressive feature, as they are long, firm, and covered by knee-high pointed-toe boots.
Flash Girl sighs… there has been NO action tonight at all. She had worked all day as Mrs. Krumbabble, and today was even quiet for a library.
Seems that kids don’t like to read anymore, such a shame. She mused how she passed the time by reading about 20 books today with her super speed, making sure no one noticed.
Suddenly… a crash comes from a nearby alley; Flash Girl jerks her head in that direction and takes off to leap to the other rooftop.
To a normal human watching her, we would have just seen her standing in one place for one second, then we would have, just for an instant, seen a red blur fly at mind boggling speeds, then we’d see Flash Girl standing more than 100 yards away! Flash Girl looks down that alley that noise came from, poised for action… she hears another crash and a baby’s cry!!!
Flash Girl doesn’t waste a second as she almost literally flies down a 20-story fire escape in literally only a few seconds. She comes to a screeching halt… and her heart jumps up in her throat as she sees a dog chewing on a dead baby!!!
She started to sprint forward to tackle the greyhound in one blink of an eye, but in another blink she stopped dead in her tracks… she looked at the dog... and saw it wasn’t a dead baby… it was a Betty Boopsie doll!
“I had one of these growing up,” Flash Girl thought, “But the company that made them went out of business years ago.” She laughed for a moment… the dog ignoring all of this still chewing away on its prize.
Flash Girl let out a sigh of relief and leaned against a nearby wall. I’ve GOT to calm down, she thought. How much easier my life would be if I didn’t have these powers... She grinned back to that day that she got the ability to move at break-neck speeds...
FLASHBACK: Flash Girl, 3 years ago, in one of New York University’s many science labs.
She had gone in to help her boyfriend Rick with the last bit of their science project: a serum that – when poured onto a plant – would make it grow much faster than normal.
So far, their research hadn’t been conclusive, but after some tests last week, they added another ingredient to the serum which, they believed, would make it work.
Flash Girl, Ms. Alice Krumbabble then, entered into that lab on that fateful day, and saw her boyfriend of 2 years frenching Lizzy Neroking!!!
Alice stared at them for a moment… and then flipped out… “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING???” Alice screamed with tears in her eyes. Rick almost crapped his pants when he saw his girlfriend standing there.
Rick, thinking he was a smooth operator, walked up to Alice, winking and opening his arms for a hug.
“Hey baby, this isn’t what it looks like… I was…”
Whatever Rick was going to say was lost, as Alice reared back and kicked forward, driving her platform sandals HARD into Rick’s balls.
Rick felt the kick, but for a moment there was only shock… then the pain set in… and BOY did it set in. Rick crumpled to the floor crying and clutching his jewels.
Alice wasn’t satisfied and pulled his hands off his nuts, an easy task since she had just kicked all the energy out of his body. She grabbed hold of her ex-boyfriends balls and started to squeeze, and tug, and yank, all to the incredible pain and horror of Rick, who could only scream high-pitched in agony. This went on for what seemed to Rick for hours, but to Alice, it was only 20 seconds.
As she was about to deliver a final squeeze, one that would destroy his manhood forever… she felt a sharp pain in the back of her neck, and now she was on her back, bleeding… and wet.
She looked up, her vision blurry, and she saw Liz, terrified… and Alice realized… Alice has just broken the vial with their growth serum over her head…. She was now being covered with chemicals… Alice passed out… When she woke up, Rick and Liz weren’t there, and she never did see them again.
But the serum had changed her… she could now move faster than the human eye! Her first idea was to go around and kick every guy in the nuts on the campus… she could DO it now, she had the speed; they’d never see it coming… But… she didn’t like that idea… most of the boys here don’t deserve that… but… she now had SUPER POWERS!!!
She could become a superhero! Fight for truth and justice! And on that day… Alice became Flash Girl!
FLASHBACK ENDS.
Flash Girl was brought back from her thinking when she looked down and saw that the greyhound was still chewing on the doll… but he had ripped it open… and something had caught her eye.
She walked over to the dog, which ran off in fear, leaving the doll behind. Flash Girl picked up the dirty old doll and looked at it… it was filled with MONEY!!! It was stuffed with 20 hundred-dollar bills… but on closer inspection… all these bills had the same number on them! These were COUNTERFEIT!!! Flash Girl thought it would be best if she sprinted over to the Daily Dolly Company, where this Betty Boopsie doll was made.
The company was miles away, but it only took Flash Girl a couple of minutes to travel that distant. She slowed down to a silent walk when the company was within sight.
The Business was on a desolate street, nothing but abandoned buildings here, so no one noticed that there’s an awful lot of activity going on in a business that’s meant to be closed.
She used her super speed to move unnoticed to one of the windows. She looked in and saw 4 armed thugs all stuffing Baby Boopsie dolls with the phony money. She knew now was the time to strike.
In a blur she sprinted back, then drove forward going through the glass window, rolling to break her fall, then stopped on her feet about 2 yards from the 4 bad guys.
“Hello guys, you’re a bit old to be playing with dolls, aren’t you?”
One of the thugs stammered and said, “It’s… it’s… it’s F-F-Flash Girl!!!” He clumsily tried to draw his gun.
“Awww, you’ve heard of me…” Flash Girl sprinted forward and unleashed a fierce kick right to the gonads of the thug.
She kicked him with such speed she was able to drop her foot and kick again, and again and again. She saw him move in slow motion, bringing his hands down to cover his jewels, but Flash Girl was so fast she was able to get in 11 kicks before he could cover himself.
All the other three guys saw was a blur that was Flash Girl’s boot for about four seconds, then they saw the thug crumple to the ground crying his eyes out…
“Oooo,” Flash Girl said, leaning down and looking into the fallen man’s teary eyes. “That looks like it HURTS! You MIGHT want to ice them down later.”
The other 3 thugs pulled out guns and started to fire. Flash Girl sprinted off to her left, the bullets not even coming close. Before the 3 guys could track her, Flash Girl sprinted back, and in a blur, she removed the guns from the 3 thugs hands.
“Listen… if you're still playing with dolls then you're DEFINITELY not old enough to be playing with guns,” Flash Girl said, showing that she had their weapons. She tossed them aside and smirked at them, “Now why don’t you just give up and surrender peacefully. You don’t want to end up like him, do ya?” She points to the floored thug oblivious to everything but the pain in his balls.
“Argh,” The smallest of the 3 thugs screamed in disgust and a thick Spanish accent, “You ain’t no threat to me, mamasita. Heee-ya!”
The littlest of the thug ran forward and performed a perfect roundhouse kick… but Flash girl easily ducked under it. The little man then drove his fist to where he thought her face was, a kick to where he thought her side was, and then a double-foot drop kick. Of course, Flash Girl in a blur dodged each of those attacks, and the final drop kick ended with the little thug on his back.
“Do you give up yet?” Flash Girl asked coyly. The little man flipped out, jumped up, ran forward, and in a blur screamed bloody murder.
The other 2 thugs couldn’t understand why till they realized that in super speed, Flash Girl had grabbed the little thug by his jewels and she was rapidly squeezing, releasing, squeezing, releasing.
The little thug doubled over coughing, moaning, and crying as Flash Girl leaned down keeping a tight squeeze on the thug’s “prizes” and said, “Are we done fighting?” She gave his balls a SHARP squeeze upward, and the little man, screaming in agony, managed to spit out, “Sí, Sí, SÍ SÍ SÍ!!!”
“Good!” Flash Girl smiled and tugged down on the little thug’s balls, bringing him to his knees, and she let go…
Just like the first thug, he too laid there bawling over his bruised jewels.
The other 2 thugs looked at her. She put her hands on her hip, “NOW will you give up? Or do you want to risk never having another ejaculation?”
The biggest of the thugs had enough; he picked up a fallen piece of lumber and wheeled it like a bat. He ran forward swinging at Flash Girls head. She dodged so quickly she was now behind him. The big thug, bewildered, turned around and saw Flash Girl, who then winked at him.
“Strike one…”
“GRRRRR!” The large man growled and swung again, to the same effect – Flash Girl was behind him again.
“Strike two, aren’t you seeing a pattern?”
The massive thug swung the lumber again, Flash Girl again sprinted behind him, but this time reached between his legs, grabbed the wood by the far end, and brought it behind her so the wood shot up and slammed the man in his nuts.
The man screamed in pain but didn’t fall.
He limped around to face Flash Girl who said, “A shot like that to your little jewelsies and you're not down… tough man, huh?” The thug swung a fist at Flash Girl, who ducked under it, pulled down the man’s pants and started to use his nutsack as a punching bag. She delivered a good solid 12 super-fast punches before the man even realized what was going on.
Flash Girl stopped, looked at the sheer agony in the man’s face, held him by his cheek for a second and whispered, “I’d say your balls just struck out.” The man collapsed clutching his swollen bruised jewels, trying not to vomit.
Flash Girl said, “You know, you three will make great additions to Sing Sing’s opera club. They’ve been looking for sopranos, you know.”
She cast a glance at the fourth thug who held his knife in his hands, but looked scared.
“Do you want to join them in the ‘balls in their throat’ club?” Flash Girl asked.
The man looked at his fallen comrades, and quickly threw his knife to the ground, putting his hands over his head.
“You know, you should never lift your hands to a girl... it leaves your jewels exposed,” Flash Girl mused to the thug as she gave him a light back hand, not enough to hurt him a lot, but enough to make him double over and remove any thoughts of fighting.
Using her super speed, she took a piece of rope that sat on a scaffolding, and she tied up the four thugs in less than a minute. She had some compassion though; she tied them so they could still hold their jewels.
“See,” she said smirking, “I’m not ALL bad.”
Suddenly, the door opened, revealing a large muscular man in a black leather trenchcoat. You’d immediately notice something about him: he had a metallic claw instead of a right hand, which was how he got his underworld nickname “STEEL CLAW!” Flash Girl almost growled when she saw him.
“FLASH GIRL!” Steel Claw growled back, “How did you find out about this place?”
“A little doggie told me,” she smirked. She raced into the man, punching at his chest, but because his claw was robotic, it possessed faster than normal speed too. It grabbed Flash Girl around the throat and lifted her off her feet.
Steel Claw laughed maniacally, “You underestimated me Flash Girl… and for that you will suffer.” Flash Girl tried not to panic as she held onto Steel Claw’s arm so she wouldn’t choke to death. She accurately aimed a perfect kick right to the man’s genitals… SMACK!!!
And… nothing… except a sharp pain in her left foot. It felt like she had just kicked a brick wall!
Steel Claw laughed, “You think I’ve learned NOTHING from our encounters? I have on a platinum cup. Even your super speed kicks wouldn’t penetrate it!” The man choked her a bit harder, laughing maniacally.
Flash Girl took this opportunity to bring her two legs together quickly and hard under the man’s armpits smashing his ribs… the shock of this caused Steel Claw to release his metallic grip on our heroine. Flash Girl rolled back, and smiled a wicked grin... this could work….
She sped forward running circles around the man. All Steel Claw could see was a red blur striking at him with what felt like was pokes. With a mighty shot Steel Claw slammed his metallic hand into Flash Girl’s ribs driving her back.
Pain engulfed her side, but she smiled because her plan worked.
“NOW I WILL DESTROY YOU, ONCE AND FOR ALL!!!” Steel Claw exclaimed.
Flash Girl smiled and said, “I don’t think so… aren’t you missing something?”
Steel Claw looked confused then was horrified when Flash Girl tossed something to him. He caught it, still horrified, because he immediately recognized it was his platinum cup!!! She must have used her super speed to pull it out of his pants!!!
In less than a blink of an eye, Flash Girl ran 10 yards and slung her foot up like a soccer player running for a penalty kick. Steel Claw knew where her foot was going, but was much too slow to stop it.
Flash Girl saw all this in slow motion, her boot-clad foot driving up and driving deep between her enemy’s legs, she could have sworn the tip of her boot disappeared as she drove it into the balls of Steel Claw.
She could feel his two jewels squish under her boot, his balls nearly crushing between her foot and his pelvis. She moved her foot back and watched the large man clutch his balls and fall to his knees whimpering like a baby. He fell to his side, gasping for air, tears rolling down his eyes, as he grasped his balls with both hands.
“I’d be careful with that steel claw of yours, buddy, wouldn’t want to cut them off, would ya?” Flash Girl said smiling.
She looked around for a phone and called Commissioner Gordy, telling him that she had Steel Claw and his thugs all tied up. Commissioner Gordy told her that they’d been looking for the group that was spending that phony dough, and how they were getting it around. Who would have suspected it was being shipped in dolls?
Flash Girl looked at Steel Claw, realizing that if she just tied him up, he could cut the rope with that claw of his; she needed a better way to keep him indisposed, and she thought she knew the way.
“Believe me Steel Claw, this is going to hurt you WAY more than it hurts me!” she giggled as she picked up some rope…
When the cops arrived, they were shocked to see all the thugs tied up, and Steel Claw hanging upside-down, by his BALLS!!!
Dangling from a rope, in more agony than you could imagine, Steel Claw was blubbering to the cops how he was in charge of this operation and how he should be put in jail with a large bucket of ice. Attached to his jacket was a Red Card that had the letters, “FG” on it, Flash Girl’s calling card.
In an Irish accent, one cop said, “Ah, thanks begorrah, she saved our fair city again, we are truly in her debt.”
ANNOUNCER: “Yes Officer Jim, we are ALL in her debt, a debt we can never fully pay off. So if any of you villains out their plan to make trouble in Flash Girl’s town, you’d better pick up some ice packs while you are out, for Flash Girl will hunt you down and when she does, it will not be a day to rejoice that you’re a man, for you will be a man with a bruised ego, and worse yet, bruised eggs!
So tune in next time, same kicking time, same kicking station.”
Credits Roll in front of a picture of Flash Girl with her knee driving into a man’s nuts.

STORY WRITTEN BY: Confused Ed
”Flash Girl” CREATED BY: Confused Ed
STORY DEDICATED TO: The good guys and gals of Yoda’s ballbusting forum.
EDITED BY: Ofladrit
MUSICAL SCORE: What music?
Copyright date: 5/26/2000
THE END.
submitted by Ofladrit to BallbustingStories [link] [comments]


2020.09.19 05:54 ThrowRACourtB My boyfriends best friend died and he is now a completely different person

I'm 20 and my boyfriend is 21 and we have dated since 2017
My boyfriends best friend who he basically spent his entire life with died in February in a moped crash, my boyfriend and a few of his other friends were there and witnessed everything that happened without going into super specific detail, he drove into the root of a tree at a high speed flew of the bike and broke his neck. My boyfriend being his best friend was the first one to go to help him and to try and save his life but there's nothing that he could have done to help him.
My boyfriend is now constantly haunted by everything that happened like to the point that he is a completely different person he used to be a very cocky confident person and is now completely depressed i don't even think he has once even now had any long periods where he smiled or was in any sort of good mood, he has panic attacks regularly that are triggered by nothing that I can tell, he doesn't talk to anyone who was there with him when his friend died, he sits for literally hours reflecting about things he won't talk about, he gets insanely angry with himself about things that don't matter, he isn't even slightly interested in anything sexual which is not at all what he was like before, he goes missing sometimes and doesn't let anyone know where he's going or where he's been and most scary for me is he has on so many different occasions had conversations with me about how he wants to commit suicide.
There are two incidents in particular that I'd like to share that I've not told anyone In my life about because he had very clearly told me not to but I badly need to hear at least someones opinion on them.
He had a breakdown where he just talked for hours with me in tears about his friend and all there memories together and probably nearly everything that they ever did together and then really really broke down when he was talking about how his friend never got to say goodbye and leave a message behind. I don't know how that sounds if it even sounds that crazy but there was just something about that the mad intense way he talked about it which to me it seemed like he was terrified whilst he was telling me and it was just a really scary experience that lasted probably 7ish hours.
He had an episode that just randomly started whilst we where just watching TV where he legitimately seemed as if he was talking to a spirt or something he was staring dead eyed at the TV whispering and its probably the scariest thing I've ever witnessed in my life it lasted around two minutes and afterwards he went to bed and refuses to talk about anything to do with it.
He completely refuses and gets very defensive when I ask him about threapy or anything related to that which leaves me just sitting here waiting for him to make a bad decision. My fears are that he will commit suicide, disappear or just never get out of the sate he's in and remain like this forever.
There are a few things I'd like to ask people and for people to give me their opinions on 1. Am I in danger? 2. Should I just tell his family everything even though he has very clearly told me not to? 3. Could he have some sort of PTSD? 4. Should I call the police when he goes missing? 5. Should I move out and give him space? 6. Should I try and reestablish contact with him and his friends?
Those are the main things I'd like peoples opinions on but also I'd just like to hear what others think generally or if they have had any similar experiences or anything at all.
Thank you to anyone who has taken the time to read this and to anyone who has taken the time to respond.
Thank you.
submitted by ThrowRACourtB to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2020.09.19 03:17 WeirdBryceGuy Beer, Stew, and Elf Skin

After the headsman had relieved the prisoner of his crime-conceiving burden, he descended the platform, leaving the thief’s remains to be dealt with by his underling. The crowd parted for the Equalizer of Men, though the headsman paid them no mind. His duty required not only a persistent solemnity, but also an emotional disassociation from the people of his town; even though his work was just, he must still maintain a certain impartiality—even unfriendliness at times—to ensure that he could perform his duties without hesitation. Whether the head on the block belonged to a brigand or a brother, he must carry out the act—must cleanly sunder the head from the neck.
As was his wont following an execution, he would visit the nearby tavern, just beside the town’s main entrance, and have a pint or two of the local brew; sometimes a bite to eat. He brought his hefty blade with him at all times; sheathed on his belt in a scabbard of Elven Skin.
The tavern owner had recognized the headsman’s habitual patronage, and had memorized the dates and times of pre-scheduled executions. Five minutes before the executions began, he would prepare the hardy stew that the headsman enjoyed, and reserve at place at the bar for the somber man once his morbid tasks were finished. The headsman never had to wait for his beverage and meal; never even had to place the order.
The headsman entered in his usual fashion—that being quietly, without acknowledgment of anyone—and promptly took his seat at the bar. His heavy bowl of stew sat on the bar, as did his mug of cheer. A fresh loaf of bread sat on a glass plate a few inches away; meant for everyone, although at this particular hour no one dared to take a portion from it. It was implicitly the property of the headsman, who enjoyed dipping pieces of bread in his stew. He did so, as usual, and ate quietly—thinking on nothing in particular.
A few minutes later, a group of travelers entered the tavern and requested seating for four. The tavern owner greeted them politely, and guided them to a table at the center of the room. The travelers were unfamiliar to the headsman, who saw their entrance through the mirror laid against the liquor wall of the tavern. The headsman had often used this mirror to examine and groom himself after an execution, on the rare occasion that the beheading was not as clean as he would’ve liked, and the arterial sprays had reached his face.
The headsman had made it a point to memorize the faces of everyone in his town, even the children, so that he was sure the person beneath his blade actually hailed from his town. There had been an incident where an accused was temporarily lodging at the nearby inn, and bore the passing likeness of another among the town. The traveler, being wholly innocent, was quickly apprehended and executed—the truth coming out only when the actual perpetrator of the crime had come forth afterwards out of shame. For his hesitation, the headsman ordered that real criminal be crushed beneath a boulder; his cowardice too egregious to be worthy of a clean blade’s death.
Once seated, the four men put in their orders, and the tavern owner left to fulfill them. The men wore thick coats of a sable fur, black leather trousers, and belts to which were affixed several weapons. There were no laws in the town regarding the carrying of personal arms, so long as the wearers did not brandish them—save in moments of self-defense. The men apparently belonged to some company or band, although they lacked any identifying sigils or coat of arms.
They appeared to have traveled far, judging by their physical features: they were much leaner than the average man of the headsman’s village, and their faces bore the pallor of the northern men—who rarely descended to the midlands; the difference in climate being too drastic for them. It was not a point of weakness, at least not to the headsman. He himself hadn’t dared venture north again after his first visit, having an acute distaste of any temperature that could freeze water.
While waiting for their order, the four men inevitably took notice of the headsman, who was a hulking figure compared to the commonfolk throughout the bar. Among their people, headsmen are esteemed, and treated as members of the royal court. The men, being northerners, were naturally elves. Elves of the North are notoriously difficult to kill by traditional means. Blades, bludgeons, and bombs have little effect on them when wielded by most commonfolk, save for inspiring the icy ire of the attacked. To slay an elf—as their headsmen must do—is to perform a feat worthy of praise. Headsman of the North not only dealt the head-parting blow, but defeated the convicted in mortal combat.
While they knew that a headsman of men was not nearly as formidable of as one of their kind, they nonetheless felt it appropriate to pay tribute to the man. One of them remained to receive their orders when the time came, and the other three left their seats and approached the headsman.
They would've performed a friendly gesture—they recognized a pat on the back as an appropriate human action—if they hadn’t seen the executioner’s scabbard. It was pitch-black, Stygian against the unstained ivory of his gem-studded apron. They recognized the material of the scabbard at once: the skin of an elf. When an elf dies, their skin blackens; becomes a taut sable material that is a fine choice for any and all manners of practical use. Unfortunately, Elves do not relinquish their lives easily, and there is no other way to gain their skin. Furthermore, elves had established an order of assassins who would seek out and mercilessly slaughter any merchant caught trading the flesh of their kind.
They had no idea that the aforementioned accused who had been wrongfully decapitated was an elf. They hadn’t any knowledge of the incident at all. Their business in the town was casual, peaceful, they had intended only to stop for food and drink, then continue on their way.
But, upon seeing the skin of an unknown but nonetheless murdered brother, they decided at that moment that the man they had come to praise must now be put to death.
The headsman did not flinch at the near-silent sound of daggers being unsheathed. Nor did he glance in the mirror, to see who his attackers were. He needn’t the knowledge. Of all the patrons who occupied the bar, only four had openly worn weapons. And though they might’ve thought their drawing to be simultaneous, he heard three distinct instances of blades sliding from their holdings; the delays imperceptible to those untaught in blade-work.
His blade sat on the bar, just out of arm’s reach. He had cleaned it during his short walk to the tavern, in clear view of the dispersing populace. It was important that they see the blade cleaned of the executed’s blood—it was meant to symbolize the removal of the darkness that always gathers within the hearts of men on the days marked for execution. The punishment was carried out, Justice had been served. There needn’t be any bad feelings once the deed was done.
He didn’t reach for his blade until the fight was already over. The first assassin tried to stab the headsman in the back, but suddenly found his face full of hot, still-steaming stew before the blade made contact. The elf, unaccustomed to harsh heat even in his food, recoiled as the slop scalded his face. The second elf side-stepped his falling brother, eyes focused entirely on the weapon-less man. Knowing that his speed was superior, he meant to deliver a vicious blow to the headsman's liver when the opportunity arose. The headsman, however, cared not for the dances of combat, and thrust out two meaty arms towards the elves head.
He seized the northerner with powerful hands, and, turning back to the bar, slammed the elf’s head onto the hard-wooden edge until the skull obliterated the bar. He hadn’t anticipated to kill the elf, only to stun him. He tossed the dazed creature aside, and stepped towards the remaining opponent.
The third elf, having lost all his nerve at the sight of his companions so effortlessly disabled, tried to turn and run away. With swift-reaching hands the headsman seized the elf by the belt, pulled him back, and delivered a debilitating blow to the back of the elf’s head. The elf stumbled forward, not yet dazed, but before he could retaliate or flee, the glass plate on which the bread had sat was launched at his temple—knocking him onto the floor.
The elf who had remained at the table rose to his feet, but a glance from the headsman turned his legs to noodles, and he sat back down.
Without pronouncement of the execution, without preamble of any kind, the headsman took his blade in his hands, propped up the three elven attackers, and rendered them headless.
When their food was finally ready, the headsman waved it over to himself. Unfortunately, they had ordered all cold items, which were virtually unpalatable to the headsman. He sent the food back, and sent word for his underling to help the remaining elf prepare the corpses for carted transport. A few coins pilfered from the pockets of the deceased were given to the tavern owner as payment for the damages.
submitted by WeirdBryceGuy to HFY [link] [comments]


2020.09.19 00:25 Marc_Rufis My ideas for a Flash trilogy in a structured DCEU

It should do what the CW show didn't:
First movie: Barry in his first runs, learning to control his powers and speed, goes against Turtle and the proto-Rogues(Cold, Heat and Mirror) as goons. Dates Iris West and has visions from past, present and future, discovering the yellow shadow of his mother's killer.
Second movie:
The Rogues debut with the addition of Golden Glider, Weather Wizard and Trickster. Gorilla Grodd is the mastermind villain, created by experiments with the Speed Force. Kid Flash is introduced and trained by Barry, and they become partners. The Rogues help Wally to free Barry from Grodd, who is trying to time travel and erradicate humanity. Grodd fails but we see speed force lightnings hitting Gorillas in Africa in the past, creating the Gorilla City society, that appear to take Grodd in the present. Barry and Iris get engaged.
A really crazy movie adapting the Silver Age fun.
Third Movie:
After the second movie, and maybe an unexpected incident in a Justice League second movie, Barry studies his power to time travel, struggling with the possibility to save his mother. He, along with Wally, his friend Cyborg and Ray Palmer, builds the Cosmic Treadmill, a time machine based on the Flash powers. They would test the machine only after the West-Allen wedding, but Barry secretly uses the machine and enters the timestream. He focuses on his mother killer, the man in the yellow suit, the demon with red eyes. Barry ends up in the future, more especifically the 25th Century, and meets a lonely and young speedster named Eobard Thawne, obsessive fan of the Flash Legacy and an explorer of the Speed Force. Meanwhile in the present, in the place of Barry, an old speedster named Jay Garrick appears, out of the Speed Force and confused. He and Wally work together to bring Barry back to come to his wedding.
We see the Reverse Flash origin from the perspective of Barry, as he works with Young Thawne, trying to get back to his wedding.
They get attacked by Older Thawne and the younger has a mental breakdown discovering he is predestined to be Flash's greatest villain and creates the Negative Speed Force.
He travels through time and fight Wally and Jay in the present, trying to murder his own ancestors, but is stopped by the duo, beggining to hate the Flash Legacy.
In the future Barry and his nemesis, both in their prime power, have an epic battle through time, going from the beggining of civilization to the far future. Thawne is more experient with time travel, as he determines wich time period they are going, but Barry is more competent with the Speed Force abilities.
Thawne throws Barry in the ice age(flash is weak to cold) and goes to save his younger self, having a heart to heart insane conversation, explaining his pourpose and ability to cheat death, ensuring his existence in this timeline.
Barry has a moment of determination, not giving up, he uses his science knowledge to vibrate and generate Speed Force energy, melting the ice. He starts to run, time traveling on his own, ending up in Central City, 52 minutes before Nora Allen's death.
The older Thawne is there and taunts Barry to save his mother and change reality, revealing that there was an original timeline where Barry grew up with his parents and still became the Flash. Reverse Flash altered the original timeline.
Barry is about to pratically create Flashpoint, but then another Barry appears!! An older Flash, in a damaged costume, says he already saved Nora Allen and that the results were catastrophic.
Thawne gets hysterical and kills the alternate Barry, as we discover through a mental breakdown that Thawne wanted a new change in the Flash's timeline, so maybe he could be free of getting captured. "By whom?" Asks Barry. "his name cannot be said"(it would be either Darkseid or the Black Flash).
Barry takes advantage of the moment to knockout Thawne and bring him to the present.
We get a scene of the young Thawne arriving to kill Nora, fullfiling part of his destiny.
Reverse Flash goes to Iron Heights.
West-Allen wedding happens, and everybody is there, including the Rogues.
submitted by Marc_Rufis to fixingmovies [link] [comments]


2020.09.19 00:20 aspienonomous Mammasaurus Rex: Moving Shenanigans Part 2

So, where I last left off in this preposterously absurd tale, it is September. Rex is of the mindset, assuming she has a mind where she can set her thoughts in place, remains debatable and borderline questionable at the best of times, that it's not that big of a deal. She has offered every kind of help a person in my situation could only dream of, simply to have those hopes bludgeoned over the head with plutonium, just in time for reality to sink in. She Is also assuming that I’ll break up with my then fiancé and she’ll morph into the antichrist and save me from homelessness. Rex has been trying to push me out of the house for months and is now triangulating between me, Hubs and 2 of my brothers, both are narcissists and my sister in law, who also just so happens to be…. gaaaaassspppp…...a narc.
Not long after Rex’s visit we get a group text from SIL, saying that their family is moving to a far off magical land in November, but they are keeping their house here for when they come and visit at XX dates and times. What on this beautiful blue orb, coasting through this shimmering candy bar galaxy could I have fucking done to win this jackpot of infinite sanity paid out in dividends!!! When NO ONE responded with oooooos and fucking aaaaahhhs she doubled down and went full fucking blown crocodile tears about how they’ll miss the fucking faaaaaamily. Rex started sending over the top “we’re crying in our beer” texts at an alarming rate. After about 5 minutes of that shitshow, I removed myself from the group. Go fucking drown yourselves in your goddamn beer, bitches.
Two hours later, Rex texts me.
Rex: Hey let’s just be honest. You’re living with Hubs. Bro1 and SIL will need to stay at our house this fall before they move in November. We will need to use your room. Are you still wanting to keep your bed? You can get a storage unit since y’all can’t fit everything in your house yet.
OP: Your ability to interpret reality is fucking astonishing! You know I live with Hubs. You’ve even BEEN TO OUR GODDAMN HOUSE. I’ve also told you at least ten times we can’t afford nor will we spend money on a storage unit, so please stop fucking suggesting it. If y’all want to help, we’ll get it done faster. I am thoroughly bewildered though, because Bro1 and SIL are keeping their house. Exactly why do they need a single room for a five person family?
Rex: I’m not sure what’s going on. It changes from day to day lol
OP: That sounds more like a tentative situation based on what you just said.
MR: I just need you to move your things out.
OP: Yeah, I got that.
The next day Rex called and I’ve mostly been avoiding her, but I know if I didn’t answer, she’d just kill my soul slowly with hundreds of guilt tripy texts. So, I put her on speaker with Hubs next to me.
OP: I only have a few minutes.
Rex: *proceeds to kill my soul slowly anyway*
Essentially, she tells me that Bro2 who’s now going to be moving into my room until November. Why he can’t fucking move back into his own goddamn room is beyond my comprehension, but who am I to question this fuckery. I now have Rex shoveling faaaamily propaganda down my throat and told to move out ALL of my shit from my room THIS FUCKING WEEKEND, as in FIVE DAYS FROM NOW! I was also instructed, as well to take the couple pieces of furniture and the 2 boxes of kitchenware out of the garage OR I could…… GET A FUCKING STORAGE UNIT. Jesus Fucking Christ and a threesome with a donkey, woman! How many times do I have to tell you? I need to wait to do that with Hubs and I’m NOT getting a storage unit! I asked what happened to Bro1 and SIL needing my room for the fall. She says she doesn’t know. Oh yeah, you cunt? Really? That's your answer? Don’t you mean to say that they never needed it in the fucking first place and you’re full of horse shit scraped up off the cobblestones dated all the way back to the 1860’s?
At this point Hubs signals to me he wants to say something.
Hubs: She needs help. Period. Full stop. You can’t expect her to do any moving until I have some free time. I’m currently working 18hr days, so I’m sure you can understand why this issue is one that we need to solve as a team. If Rex, Dad, and Bro2 want to help, we could possibly have it done this weekend. Would you be willing to help her? I’ll also clearly remind you that we already said we don’t want the bed frame or the mattress, so you can move them out of the room to speed up the process. We will not be moving ANY of the furniture this weekend. We will most likely be by Sunday and move as much as we can.
Hubs has his very own sadistically narc mom, so when she tried to guilt him, he shut that shit down.
She said just as long as it’s out by “fall” she’ll be happy. I remind her that she’s been saying that for the past 4 fucking months and it’s September. It’s already “fall.” She said by November will be fine. FUCKING NOVEMBER!!!! Ok, cool, so just in the nick of fucking time for when all the siblings no longer need to use my goddamn room. Fuck you. I tell her I have to go bash my head in with a 2x4 and she said she does too, but then she spends the next several minutes going into an unrelated work story. I don’t give an ever-loving shit about your life, bitch! Shut the fuck up! Thankfully, Hubs talks over her and ends the call.
My head is spinning like Michelle Kwan at the winter Olympics and I'm trying to make sense of this shit. Every single part of that bullshit was contradictory and a load of insane clown posse. Hubs and I both agreed that from this point on, even though it's MY family and it should be MY circus, that we'll discuss ahead of time what our decisions would be and he would take any phone call or text conversation because they don't know him. They wouldn’t dare lower their shield of perfection. So, my demi-god of a husband wants to be my personal meat shield because we're a united front with what we decide on. They lose any possible grasp of power and control of the situation when I'm ejected from the fucking equation.
At the time, we were struggling financially. I have a decent education, but due to trauma, I don’t remember jackshit. You could tell me I have two BS degrees and one BA degree and I’d argue with you that your fucking mom dropped you on your face as an infant. On purpose. I have zero memories of college. The jobs available to me now are limited and I had to get creative in order to pull myself out of this gaping financial hole I created for myself. Spoiler alert: I TOTALLY DID! BY TOTALLING MY CAR! Now I wouldn’t have chosen this path, nor recommend it (LMFAO), but the equity paid off my debt.
I used to be disappointed that even though Rex has been nagging and nagging about getting my shit out and she would “help” me, she wouldn't lift a dainty manicured pinky to do anything of the sort. Those boomers are booming loaded. My inheritance is substantial, but at this point in my life, I honestly don’t fucking care. LIES!! I tell lies!! It really boils down to a fucking balance of how much bullshit am I willing to put up with so me and Hubs can live out our future fantasy where we own hundreds of acres, the nearest neighbor is at least five miles away, on a ranch with heards of goats, alpacas, horses, Great Danes and Golden Retrievers. A utopia where we can live out our misanthropic pipe dream.
That night during dinner, we were discussing this coming weekend and that we agreed to go and move out as much of my shit as we can, just to avoid the future manufactured and incoherent drama. The following week was full of insanity and lots and lots of alcohol. I’ll leave it here and since I’m officially on vacation and have begun the fucking awesome tradition of day drinking, I’m sure part 3 will soon follow. I just have to add all the sweary bits.
See ya!
submitted by aspienonomous to FuckeryUniveristy [link] [comments]


2020.09.19 00:00 ranger_from_th_north [Online][MotW][UTC-6][18+][LGBTQIA+ Friendly] Experimental Twitch stream in development; Casting applications open! Looking for 3 to 4 players & GMs! Three Days Left to Apply!

*Disclaimer\*
Before ANYTHING else, it should be known that our table supports women, peoples with disabilities, people who are gender non-conforming and the LGBTQIA+, Black, Indigenous and Minority communities. We are also supportive of freedom of religion or lack thereof. #BlackLivesMatter
-Now the post-
Hello there! My name is Saul (he/him) and we are TurnTables RPG! An experimental, role-playing stream in which we evoke the most oldest and noblest of sentiments: Sharing is caring.
This post is for the “Forever GMs.” For the players who want to GM but are nervous about world-building and becoming a “Forever GM.” This post is for the content creators who want to hone their storytelling and improv skills. This post is for the writers who wish to see their stories or characters be given a platform to be shared. This post is for those who want to expand their creativity and collaborate with like-minded individuals.
Explanation:
TurnTables RPG is a live-play RPG show that will stream on Twitch weekly. Because Monster of the Week by Michael Sands lends itself more to an episodic television format, that is the game we will begin the stream with. Later on we may have the time and resources to expand our content to other games such as Call of Cthulhu, Vampire: the Masquerade, other Powered by the Apocalypse games, Dungeons&Dragons and many more.
Currently our team consists of two producers and me. The stream will be made up of 4 to 5 cast members, including me. We, as a collective cast and crew, will be building this stream from the ground up.
In normal RPG fashion, each week will have the cast as their characters role-playing scenarios set forth by the GM of that week. The on-going story will then be handed off to a different cast member every week to GM, unless a two-shot is necessary.
Every GM will play and every player will GM. Therefore, the cast must be well-versed in the rules of MotW and have a character in order to play.
Before the stream goes live, the cast will come together to create their MotW characters. During that time, the cast will world-build together and establish the mythos/rules of the world.
Afterwards, a “showrunner” will be chosen for the upcoming season. The “showrunner” will be in charge of setting the premise for the season and being the first GM to kick off that season. Very much akin to television/streaming directors who write/direct weekly episodes in a series established by a showrunner, the other cast members will still be weekly GMs running their individualized stories within the premise set by the “showrunner”.
For the sake of time and clarity of vision, I will be the “show-runner” for the first season. However, the MotW world we play in will be the world the cast built together. The hope is that after the first season, the rest of the cast will feel comfortable enough with the format for one of them to take the reins as “showrunner” for the new season.
We are looking for enthusiastic players/GMs to join our stream’s cast.
Requirements:
*We want our table, our audience and our community to be a safe space and any actions/language that do not align with that will result in executive action by myself and the producers. *
Preferences:
Schedule:
*Some scheduling dates are subject to change depending on cast’s availability
*Play interview: applicants will be set up into randomized play groups, scheduled to meet over Discord video and will play a game of MotW run by myself. During that time applicants will be judged by a number of factors including but not limited to; their technical set up, their creative savvy and their improvisational skills.
Decisions made during the play interviews are not personal in any way and TurnTables RPG is dedicated to ensuring that the proper talent go to the proper project, so we ask that applicants who do not make it past the play interviews still be open to the possibility of later collaboration.
For the foreseeable future this stream will not be turning a profit. If, down the road, that reality changes then it will be a discussion amongst the cast & crew on how that will be distributed. For the time being, we want to start this stream and begin building a community around it.
TL;DR – We are TurnTables RPG, an experimental weekly RPG show streamed on Twitch. We are launching our inaugural Monster of the Week show and we are holding applications for 3 to 4 cast members. The cast members will be asked to both GM and play characters. Set within a world made collaboratively by the cast, the story will be handed off to a new GM weekly, who will run a session based within a pre-established premise. Please review the post for Requirements/Preferences. There is a question box within the Google Form application below. We look forward to hearing from you!
Application Link!
submitted by ranger_from_th_north to lfgmisc [link] [comments]


2020.09.18 23:59 Skater96993 Passed A+ 1002 - Certified!

WOOOOOT WOOOOT 750/900
Thanks for everyone keeping up with the sub, it helped me find motivation and had a ton of helpful info needed to pass the a+! Hope I can give back and help at least one person studying

Good luck to everyone! Dont get discouraged if you dont pass right away, this is a process but its well worth it in the end!
submitted by Skater96993 to CompTIA [link] [comments]


2020.09.18 23:04 Marc_Rufis My ideas for a Flash trilogy in a structured DCEU

It should do what the CW show didn't:
First movie: Barry in his first runs, learning to control his powers and speed, goes against Turtle and the proto-Rogues(Cold, Heat and Mirror) as goons. Dates Iris West and has visions from past, present and future, discovering the yellow shadow of his mother's killer.
Second movie:
The Rogues debut with the addition of Golden Glider, Weather Wizard and Trickster. Gorilla Grodd is the mastermind villain, created by experiments with the Speed Force. Kid Flash is introduced and trained by Barry, and they become partners. The Rogues help Wally to free Barry from Grodd, who is trying to time travel and erradicate humanity. Grodd fails but we see speed force lightnings hitting Gorillas in Africa in the past, creating the Gorilla City society, that appear to take Grodd in the present. Barry and Iris get engaged.
A really crazy movie adapting the Silver Age fun.
Third Movie:
After the second movie, and maybe an unexpected incident in a Justice League second movie, Barry studies his power to time travel, struggling with the possibility to save his mother. He, along with Wally, his friend Cyborg and Ray Palmer, builds the Cosmic Treadmill, a time machine based on the Flash powers. They would test the machine only after the West-Allen wedding, but Barry secretly uses the machine and enters the timestream. He focuses on his mother killer, the man in the yellow suit, the demon with red eyes. Barry ends up in the future, more especifically the 25th Century, and meets a lonely and young speedster named Eobard Thawne, obsessive fan of the Flash Legacy and an explorer of the Speed Force. Meanwhile in the present, in the place of Barry, an old speedster named Jay Garrick appears, out of the Speed Force and confused. He and Wally work together to bring Barry back to come to his wedding.
We see the Reverse Flash origin from the perspective of Barry, as he works with Young Thawne, trying to get back to his wedding.
They get attacked by Older Thawne and the younger has a mental breakdown discovering he is predestined to be Flash's greatest villain and creates the Negative Speed Force.
He travels through time and fight Wally and Jay in the present, trying to murder his own ancestors, but is stopped by the duo, beggining to hate the Flash Legacy.
In the future Barry and his nemesis, both in their prime power, have an epic battle through time, going from the beggining of civilization to the far future. Thawne is more experient with time travel, as he determines wich time period they are going, but Barry is more competent with the Speed Force abilities.
Thawne throws Barry in the ice age(flash is weak to cold) and goes to save his younger self, having a heart to heart insane conversation, explaining his pourpose and ability to cheat death, ensuring his existence in this timeline.
Barry has a moment of determination, not giving up, he uses his science knowledge to vibrate and generate Speed Force energy, melting the ice. He starts to run, time traveling on his own, ending up in Central City, 52 minutes before Nora Allen's death.
The older Thawne is there and taunts Barry to save his mother and change reality, revealing that there was an original timeline where Barry grew up with his parents and still became the Flash. Reverse Flash altered the original timeline.
Barry is about to pratically create Flashpoint, but then another Barry appears!! An older Flash, in a damaged costume, says he already saved Nora Allen and that the results were catastrophic.
Thawne gets hysterical and kills the alternate Barry, as we discover through a mental breakdown that Thawne wanted a new change in the Flash's timeline, so maybe he could be free of getting captured. "By whom?" Asks Barry. "his name cannot be said"(it would be either Darkseid or the Black Flash).
Barry takes advantage of the moment to knockout Thawne and bring him to the present.
We get a scene of the young Thawne arriving to kill Nora, fullfiling part of his destiny.
Reverse Flash goes to Iron Heights.
West-Allen wedding happens, and everybody is there, including the Rogues.
submitted by Marc_Rufis to DCcomics [link] [comments]


2020.09.18 19:07 NeverSinkDev [LOOTFILTER] NeverSink's Itemfilter 7.10.0 - HEIST

[LOOTFILTER] NeverSink's Itemfilter 7.10.0 - HEIST

This update has been a little bit tricky, because it's hard to update a filter with SO many new items, without ever playing the league. Expect adjustments to the filters within the first day, once we get to know the league a little bit.
That being said, it still contains a LOT of other improvements, such as the vastly improved rare tiering and some improvements to identified item tiering and I'm also working on a MASSIVE 8.0 update. More on that during the next weeks.
Please note that if the servers will be overloaded (because there's 10k people on the site trying to do things at the same time), ease down and try again soon!
Ladder filters will be updated in 10-20 minutes, still building.
https://filterblade.xyz/ - is of course also updated!
Want to watch me code/poe, get live updates or support the project?:
[PATREON] [TWITTER] [DISCORD] [TWITCH] [GITHUB] [FAQ]

Download

Source Description
FilterBlade.xyz (DOWNLOAD) Recommended way of downloading the filter. Has support for all strictness, styles and economy versions! Includes overview, explanations and a loot simulator. Experienced users can also edit filters there comfortably and merge their changes into new versions. Always up-to-date!
POE site filter list You can subscribe to my POE filter account to receive auto-updates. However, you can't customize these and it has no style support! Come in SC/HC economy versions.
GitHub Mostly for developers: you can also get the filters from GitHub! There's a SC, HC and stable/static branch

Changelogs

The Filter changelogs can always be found here: CHANGELOGS
The FilterBlade changelogs can be found on the FilterBlade discord: DISCORD

Filter and Styleversions

Higher strictnesses filter more items. The general rule is that: the faster you are, the less you want to pick up, because in the time you'd take care of a higher quantity of items, you can kill more monsters and get a higher chance at expensive loot and experience. You can start with RegulaSemi-Strict first (great for new players and leagues) and simply up the strictness from the option menu, once you feel like you want to see less.
Nr Name Short Description
0 Soft Shows too much. Includes low crafting bases, magic jewellery in the endgame. Not recommended for regular gameplay.
1 Regular Shows a lot. Recommended for beginners, new leagues and slow-clearing gameplay. Shows all rares. Good for chaos recipes.
2 Semi-Strict Healthy balance. Great for new leagues and beginners and medium-speed endgame gameplay. Hides the worst rares. Good for chaos recipes.
3 Strict Hides bad-base rares and scrolls in the endgame. Disables most recipes. Recommended endgame strictness.
4 Very Strict Hides most rares, scrolls, augments, armourers. Good for the endgame and for farming once your character is well equipped.
5 Uber Strict Hides all low currencies and rares. Great for speed-farming, once you have a highly optimized build and atlas! Hides maps of tier 10 and lower.
6 Uber+ Strict Shows too little. Sterile screen. Hides all kind of stuff, including mediocre divination cards, all kind of crafting material etc. Recommended for high-speed clearing, once your character is top tier geared, your atlas complete and optimized and you're breezing through maps very fast! Hides maps of tier 13 and lower.
Styles have no effect on how strict the filter is, but change the visual and audio configuration. Find one that pleases your eye most or make your own on https://www.filterblade.xyz . FilterBlade also comes with a preview comparison/feature for styles and strictnesses.

Special thanks to...

  • Tobnac and Haggis - the 2 others minds behind filterblade + great friends
  • A special thank you to all the Patreons! A special thanks goes to: Ryndaar, Phegan, Matt O.,Henry G., Reilly M!
  • A special thanks to my discord and twitch community!
Happy Hunting Exiles,
~NeverSink
submitted by NeverSinkDev to pathofexile [link] [comments]


2020.09.18 13:11 dagodfather11 Day in the omnitrix S3 E4: Doggin

(O 10 tower)
Wildmutt: The prophecy is true
(Wildmutt gets up and leaves in the elevator)
Stinkfly: Anyway...
(9 to 5 by Dolly Parton starts playing as we see Wildmutt walking past 3 buildings and is about to go into the ice cream shop when he gets call on his omnitrix. He looks down in annoyance)
(Plane, right above Incursion alien trafficking base. Wildmutt takes a big puff out of a cigar and as the beat drops, so does Wildmutt. It doesn't take long for the ground forces to notice him, so they start opening fire upon him. Wildmutt, blank faced as ever, activates his nano shoulder pads and they both combined into a jetpack with wings and Wildmutt rockets downward into the danger, dipping and dodging through the blaster fire)
(Once he gets close enough, he disengages his jetpack and goes into a dive kick. He lands it square into one of the guards face and because of the speed of the kick, his face is now meat slush on the wall. Wildmutt then leaps onto another guard and throws him against the wall, ripping out his throat. He then dodges more blaster fire and retaliates by activating one of his nano pads into his shoulder gun which he fires back with, nailing a guard in the eye and another in the throat. Another guard comes up on him and tries to attack him, but Wildmutt grabs his arm and snaps it, elbows him in the gut, uppercuts him, grabs his legs, does a backwards body slam, rolls over his body, bits his head off, and throws it at the others as a distraction)
(He uses the opportunity to vault over the table to get cover. The Incursions start looking around. Wildmutt notices that he's been hit in his side, but he pays no mind to it. He pops out both of his shoulder guns. He leaps into the air and caps 2 guards in their faces. He hauls ass to a door while avoiding the shots. He shoulder charges the door, knocking it and a little bit of the wall around it out. He quickly lifts up the door and charges the rest of the guards while using it as a shield. He then grabs the door handle and then throws the door with the force of god and it decapitates one of the guards against the wall)
(Wildmutt charges the 2 of the 5 remaining Incursions. He slides under them both. He then punches a hole through one and trips the other, finishing him off with a neck snap. He then grabs one of their blasters and stands on his hind legs to shoot 2 of the guards and disable the last one. Wildmutt drops the gun and in a desperate attempt, the guard tries to attack Wildmutt with his tongue...Wildmutt catches it and looks at the Incursion with disappointment. He pulls the guard towards him, then back kicks him. He pulls him back again, then he punches him. He pulls him back a final time, only to grab his face and do a spinning face slam into the ground, ending the song and the guards life as his face is completely squashed into the floor. Wildmutt looks at his bloody hand)
Wildmutt: "Clean kill"
(Wildmutt shakes off the blood on his hand and doggy shakes the rest of the blood on his body away. He then barges into the bosses room)
Incursion boss: Wait wait WAIT!
(Without hearing a single word he says, Wildmutt shoots him with his shoulder gun. He then releases all the captured aliens, and then he leaves. Completely unfazed about what he just did)
(The Rath house, oval office. Rath is sitting at the desk arguing with Water hazard. Wildmutt walks into the room angrily at Rath)
Rath: MUTT! MY FAVORITE GOOD BOY. RATH KNEW YOU COULD DO IT. NOW HERE'S YOUR REWARD, (puts a briefcase on the table) $7 THOUSAND DOLLARS IN CA...
(Before he could finish, Wildmutt clocks hims across the face. He grabs the case, nods at Water hazard and Water hazard does the same. He then leaves)
Rath: THE HELL WAS THAT FOR!
Water hazard: Must've got in the way of his ice cream time. He doesn't fuck around with that shit
(Wildmutt then makes his way back to the ice cream shop but before he walks in, he gets another call on his omnitrix. He punches the ground and then answers the call in acceptance)
Gutrot: Hey, we need you to come in. Big important meeting tonight so we can't just set a normal lackey to...
(Wildmutt hangs up. He looks at the ice cream shop and then to the case of money. He then throws the case on the roof of the ice cream shop in frustration, then leaves)
(The cloud, Gutrot and Pesky dust base of operations for their drug ring)
Pesky dust: Bro, you sure we should've brought him in?
Gutrot: I'm just making sure that if the deal does go south, we can get out of it in more then one way
Pesky dust: You better be right about this. (He looks at one of their henchmen) You, go get me some tea. Sweet and that shit better have ice
Henchman: Yes ma'am
(The henchman goes wide eyed as he realizes what he just said. He turns around and Pesky dust is right in his face)
Pesky dust: The fuck did you just say?
Henchman: No no no, boss please, it was a mis...
(Pesky dust flicks him on the forehead, filling his head with his fears. The henchman screaming at the unimaginable nightmares jumping in and out of his head. He finally can't take it anymore, so he takes out his gun and shoots himself in the head. His body falls down to the floor)
Gutrot: What the fuck Dust!
Pesky dust: What? He called me ma'am!
Gutrot: Yeah I know, but when that usually happens, they end up going in the white room until their same again. The fuck did you make him see?!
Pesky dust: Look I'm tired of this shit happening, I am a fucking dude, and the next person who says otherwise, I will kill my damn self!
(Wildmutt comes into the room. He looks around and notices the body. He looks at Pesky dust in confusion and the walk off to the meeting room)
Gutrot: (looking at 2 more henchman) Clean this up, make sure no one disturbs us
10 minutes later
(The meeting. Pesky dust and Gutrot sit on one side of the table. Wildmutt is curled up at the end of the table. Wildmutt looks at Gutrot in annoyance)
Gutrot: Look, they should be here any second
(The door at the opposite end of Wildmutt opens. Bullfrag enters. Wildmutt pops up in shock)
Bullfrag: Whoa whoa what the fuck!
(Bullfrag pulls a gun on Wildmutt and Wildmutt points one of his shoulder guns at Bullfrag. Pesky dust and Gutrot do the same, both drawn on Bullfrag. Wildmutt growls at Bullfrag)
Gutrot: Little early for this isn't it Frag?
Bullfrag: What the hell is this Gut! Why is he here?!
Gutrot: He's here as a precaution just incase shit went sideways. Seems I made the right call
Bullfrag: Do you know who this is? This is the son of a bitch that just took down one of my cashes!
(Pesky dust and Gutrot look at Mutt and then back to Frag)
Pesky dust: Was it one of your cashes, or one of your "off the record" projects?
Bullfrag: Does it matter? My cameras caught this guy dropping in from a military grade jump plane!
Pesky dust: The fuck Mutt?
(Pesky dust turns his gun on Wildmutt. Wildmutt then stands on his hind legs and points his other shoulder gun at Pesky dust)
Gutrot: Dust what the fuck are you doing?
Pesky dust: Did you hear what he just said, Mutt might be a fed!
Gutrot: We already don't like Frag, so you're really gonna trust him?
Bullfrag: Oh fuck you Rot!
Gutrot: Now hold on now, you may be lying but trust me, these shots are no joke
(Four arms walks in the room through the open entrance with his taydenite pistols trained on each person in the room)
Four arms: I just got here and you guys started without me?
(He locks eyes with Wildmutt)
Four arms: Mutt?
Wildmutt: Quad?
Four arms: (surprised that he's speaking) WHAT THE FUCK?
Wildmutt: (looking at Dust and Rot) Why the fuck is he here, I told you not to bring him here when I'm here!
Gutrot: I thought since you knew him, the deal would go a lot smoothly!
Four arms: WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING?!
30 minutes later
(Outside of the cloud, nightfall, Four area's truck. Wildmutt lays curled up on the hood. Four arms walks up)
Four arms: So...that was something
(Wildmutt is Silent)
Four arms: Were you ever gonna tell us?
(Wildmutt still quiet)
Four arms: CUT THE SILENT BULLSHIT MUTT!
Wildmutt: Got nothing to say
Four arms: Your a fucking mercenary
Wildmutt: I'm a lot of things
Four arms: That's not helping. You know I have to tell the guys right?
Wildmutt: I wouldn't advise that
Four arms: What, you gonna kill me?
(Wildmutt looks at Four arms with agreement)
Four arms: What the fuck man!
Wildmutt: Look, I'm just saying, it would be best to keep my life out of theirs
Four arms: They can handle it
(Wildmutt pops up)
Wildmutt: No the fuck they cannot. The things they l go through on a daily basis, is breadcrumbs compared to the shit I've been through.The things I've seen, the things I've done...
Four arms: The people you've killed
(Silence)
Wildmutt: It's never personal. I don't enjoy it. Everyone has to be good at something, I just landed on being discreet and killing people....it's just a job
Four arms: Yeah, I get that. My hands aren't exactly clean either
Wildmutt: I'd be surprised if they were. Hmm, while you're over here integrating me, what was that meeting for?
Four arms: Well, we've been colliding for a while. Gutrot and Pesky with their hallucinations, sell like hotcakes. Bullfrag mostly moves coke, but as you know, he does some extremely shady shit off the record. Wildvine got out of the game 2 years ago. He made the most money with the green he cooked up and once he was set, he was out. Then there's me
Wildmutt: (confused) What, you move meth?
Four arms: Nope...candy
Wildmutt: (baffled) Oh you fucking mad man
Four arms: Like you said, it's just a job
(They both laugh)
Four arms: Look, I'm not gonna tell the rest. But they'll figure out sooner or later
Wildmutt: Trust me, they won't
Four arms Why you say that?
Wildmutt: Because I been at this shit for the last 9 years and your just now finding out about it. Off of convenience by the way. Speaking of, shouldn't we get back to the meeting?
Four arms: Oh no, the meetings done, total failure, no peace. They actually gave me a 5 min head...
(They are then fired upon. Quad and Mutt let out a flurry of "shits and fucks" as they get in the truck and drive away)
Wildmutt: Give me a heads up next time!
Four arms: Come on, don't act like you haven't been shot at before
Wildmutt: I have, doesn't mean I enjoy it!
Four arms: Come on, let's go get Grey and play some poker
40 min later
(O 10 tower, Four arms and Wildmutt are taking the elevator up)
Wildmutt: Remember, not a word
Four arms: (frustrated) Yeah yeah...I got it
Wildmutt: You good?
Four arms: No, it's just. Something bugging me about Grey. He doesn't seem right
(Wildmutt looks down, contemplating. The elevator stops, and they walk out)
Four arms: Hey guys, found a stray
Ghostfreak: There he is, where's Grey?
Four arms: Not showing, where's Blast and Sticky?
Ghostfreak: Asleep and on a date with his girlfriend
Four arms: Huh, so it was true.
Xlr8: Yeah, now get over here and get ready to chow down on these fajitas
(Four arms sits down at the table with Upgrade, Ripjaws, Diamond head, and Ghostfreak. Wildmutt curls up in a corner)
Ripjaws: These fajitas are the shit Xlr8
Ghostfreak: Yeah they're good, got nothing on a jailhouse burrito tho
(Silence)
Upgrade: The fuck is a jailhouse burrito
(Stinkfly then comes in from the sky opening)
Stinkfly: WHAT'S UP BITCHES!
Four arms: Someone's happy
Stinkfly: Hell yeah, I just had the best sex of my life!
(The O 10 look at each other)
Diamond head: That's a high statement
Stinkfly: Yep, she is amazing! Had me doing positions that I didn't even know existed, AND THAT'S SAYING SOMETHING
Xlr8: Aye simmer down there, some of us are trying to eat
Four arms: No, shut the fuck up. I am the only one who understands and respects Stinkys game. I'm proud of this man. Finally got a real girl, and she smashes good, my man is winning
Stinkfly: See, thank you, glad someone recognizes a player at work, and the cherry on top, she's on her way up for round 2
Four arms: Hell ya! That's my....
(The elevator dings, and out steps a tetramand woman in minimal reveling nightclub outfit. She goes wide eyed as she makes eye contact Four arms)
Four arms: (baffled) Daughter?!
(The entire O 10 stare, unholy amounts of what the fuck being expressed on their faces)
(Diamond head slowly slides Upgrade a $10 bill)
submitted by dagodfather11 to Ben10 [link] [comments]


2020.09.18 12:35 whyismywatchstopped A whole bunch of Bannerlord tips and tricks you may not know (as of version e.1.5.1)

Bannerlord is a great game that is currently plagued by some serious issues, from glitches and bugs to simply not bothering to explain its own mechanics. Without any mitigation or forewarning, these little problems can really snowball and ruin your experience. I've compiled this list of tips and tricks to help other players get around some of these problems and also to maximise your fun while the game remains in early access.
 
I've separated everything up into categories so that you don't have to dig through too much to get to the stuff you're interested in. Also, stuff that's relevant to new players only is marked with a [NP] in front of it, so you can skip that if you already know the basics.
 
Edit: Wow, I hit the 40000 character limit so now I have to add more tips as comments instead!
 

How Stats, Skills and Perks work

[NP] Your character's progression consists of increasing stats, skills, focus, perks and levels. Stats govern your base aptitude in a set of three skills. For example, the Vigor stat affects your aptitude with one-handed, two-handed and polearm skills. Skills represent your ability with that particular skill. For example, the Bow skill affects your aim with the bow and the Steward skill directly affects how many members you can have in your party. Perks are essentially special abilities that are awarded at specific skill levels, e.g. 25, 50, 75 and 100. Sometimes you will get to choose between two perk options. Make sure you check whether a perk is implemented before you choose that perk! (See paragraph below) Lastly, focus points allow you to increase your max skill level with a skill and also provide an exp multiplier, making you gain skill points faster. Note that if you try to train a skill that's reached its limit, it will grow very slowly and eventually stop growing altogether. Thus, you need a constant investment of both stats and focus points to max out a skill. Since your stat and focus points are limited, I suggest you prioritize only a few skills to max out, and accept that the rest will never be fully completed.
 
[NP] In the character creation screen, the various skills are grouped by stats (in bold, above the individual skills) and each specific skill can have up to 5 focus points assigned (the vertical bars). Each skill you can learn is limited to a max number which is determined by the combination of stat and focus points you have for that skill. With full focus (5 bars), you will need about 6-8 stat points in a skill to allow you to completely max it out. Furthermore, the perks available for each skill are only partially implemented. This means that investing points into some skills is currently useless. To see which perks are implemented, I recommend using a site like https://www.bannerlordperks.com. At the time of writing this post, the entire "Cunning" stat has zero perks implemented, making it virtually useless to you. If you're new, I highly recommend getting points in Social, Vigor and Endurance. Social (specifically the charm skill) allows you to convince nobles to marry/join you more easily and improves your troops' morale (leadership skill). Vigor is your basic melee combat stat, which you will use a lot in the early game and especially in the arena. Lastly, endurance allows you to improve your movement speed (riding/athletics) and is necessary for smithing (skill), which is a really useful mechanic that I highly recommend you try. Another good choice is Control, if you wish to be a ranged character.
 
So how does leveling work in Bannerlord? Well here's what the Skills screen looks like using the character (C) menu Using skills with slowly increase your ability with them. The more focus points you have in a skill, the faster it's skill points will go up. Furthermore, your character will gain "exp" every time he/she gains skill points. Or more accurately, exp in this game IS skill points. That is to say, training the various skills is the only way to level up. NOT killing enemies, as you might have first thought. This means you can level up just by trading, smithing, running around, or leading armies. You don't even need to fight simulated battles mostly, though doing so will award you with tactics points and some combat skill points. Every level you gain will award you with either a stat point, a focus point, or both. You can spend these points to increase the relevant stat or skill focus bar. When you have points to assign, they will show up on your character screen. In the earlier screenshot is your NPC brother who you always start with, though his name and appearance is randomized. Because I chose the "assign perks myself" option, I can choose his perks right away (represented by little numbered shield icons next to his skills that tell you how many perks are available to choose). You'll note that to the left and right of the "Skills" table there are weird icons with the number 0 next to them. The left number represents stat points to assign, and the right number is focus points. Your new character will start with 1 free focus point to assign. To assign a focus point, select the desired skill and click the "+" sign. REMEMBER: No choices will be saved unless you click "Done", and you can revert all changes made so far by clicking the curved arrow between "Done" and "Cancel". To assign perks, click on the shield icons in the banner in the middle of the skill page and a popup will appear. Click on the perk you wish to choose - again making sure it's actually implemented first - and then when finished click "Done" to finalize your choices. Don't forget that you can use the left/right arrows to assign skills and perks for your NPCs too!
 
One more thing about perks. The "Governor" perks DO NOT APPLY to your character, because you can't be the governor of any of your cities/castles. Thus, don't pick governor perks for your main hero unless they also come with side-abilities that you want.
 

Starting the Game and the Main Storyline

[NP] The various factions each come with a special ability. You can use all troops from all factions, so don't worry about being shoehorned into any particular troop type by your choices. Instead, focus on the ability you'll get. Not all abilities are made equal and not all factions are equal either. Currently, the Khuzait faction is kind of OP due to the AI being too dumb to figure out how to handle horse archers, so select them for an easier early-game. Vlandia gets bonus troop exp, which means you can promote veteran troops faster than others. Empire skills are building-focused, which means you need to own fiefs to really gain any benefit from using them. Sturgia are... faster in snow. Also their troops are supposedly weaker than normal (this will eventually change), so pick Sturgia if you're a masochist. Battania are kind of situational with their forest boost (so maybe don't pick them either), and Aserai get trading bonuses, so pick them if you want to be a merchant or just like money.
 
[NP] Clicking the various family options will show you the potential change in stat points and focus points that you will gain for that choice. You will have about 7 different choices to make before your character is ready to play. Try to pick choices which focus on your ideal stats and skills while minimizing the other ones. Here's a sample character I generated using the stats I recommended earlier. Don't worry too much about making perfect choices here, since you will gain many more stat and focus points throughout your game too. Plus, you'll use most of the stats/skills at one point or another. After this, your brother will ask if you want to do the tutorial. The tutorial only teaches you how to fight, so if you already know that you can skip it.
 
If you follow the story you will play through a storyline quest for a while until you've rescued your siblings and experienced the execution mechanic in action. Then you will have to chase down a bunch of clan leaders and lie to two special characters who will never interact with you again once you've made your final choice. However, and this is something I want to emphasize heavily: You do NOT need to make a choice about what to do with the dragon banner immediately. In fact, I strongly recommend you do NOT make a decision until you're very well situated in the game. Why? Because it starts a doomsday timer that you cannot slow down or affect in any way, and when it runs out 3 factions will declare war on you all at once and try to grind your entire faction into the dust. Instead, forget about the story quest and just enjoy the game at that point until you are extra powerful and ready to take on the world. Once you succeed at that quest I'm pretty sure you win the game, and if you start it before you're ready you'll be in for a world of hurt.
 

The Campaign Map

The game has a really useful feature called the "Encyclopedia". Press 'N' to open it when in the campaign screen. If you want to track down a notable figure, you can search their name or clan in the search bar and it will tell you where they were last seen. Anytime you speak to another noble or visit a settlement, town or castle, it will update the rumours of where that noble was seen most recently. This will allow you to track down anyone with ease. You can also see if they were taken prisoner, got pregnant, or switched allegiances recently. Furthermore, you can use the Encyclopedia to check nobles' relations with you or each other, allowing you to single out the nobles who hate their liege and are ripe for conversion to your kingdom. You can also use the encyclopedia to check troop upgrade paths, details about cities/settlements, and info on minor factions, who are like secret clans that you can recruit if you choose to be your own kingdom. All in all, it's incredibly useful for planning your next move.
 
There's a circle next to city/settlement names in the overworld and the encyclopedia. Clicking that circle "bookmarks" the city/settlement, which means you can easily find it on the map. Clicking it again removes the bookmark.
 
[NP] If you hover over any of the symbols at the bottom right-hand corner of the screen, you can get detailed info on how the values are calculated. The symbols are, from left to right, money, influence, HP, troops, food and morale. The money icon will show you your daily income vs daily expenses. Influence will show your influence gain/loss over time. HP is your own health and recovery rate. Troops shows what troops you have in your army. Food shows how much food you have and morale shows what's affecting the mood of your soldiers. Using these icons helps you figure out what you need to do to make their values go up instead of down.
 

Fighting Battles

Against minor enemies like looters, it's usually relatively safe to use "Send Troops" instead of going in there yourself. You won't gain tactics skill from this, but your troops will gain all the exp instantly instead of spending 5 minutes fighting first.
 
[NP] You can issue commands to your troops by using the F keys. F1 is the movement menu, F2 is the direction menu, F3 is the formation menu, F4 is whether or not to use ranged weapons, F5 is mount/dismount for cavalry, F6 enables AI control, and F7 allows you to split your groups up and assign the split members to other groups. (e.g. split infantry and assign half to "heavy infantry"). You can also use the number keys (i.e. 1,2,3 etc) to select specific groups of troops to give orders to. 1 is infantry, 2 is archers, 3 is melee cavalry etc. Any non-mapped number selects all troops. This allows you to have fine-grained control during combat. HOWEVER for the most part the numbers and relative experience of the two armies is the deciding factor in how a battle goes. Sometimes you can use the terrain to your advantage, but mostly your tactics will do very little to actually affect the battle's outcome, especially in sieges where taking control of the AI will completely break their ability to use siege equipment and attack or defend properly.
 
Some basic strategies for manually commanding troops during simulated battles are as follows:
  • The lazy way: Immediately press 0 and then F6 at the start of a battle. Your troops will do their own thing and you can just run/ride around increasing your combat skills without having to worry about managing battles.
  • The terrain way: Place infantry in front of your archers and put your archers on high ground. The archers will pick off lots of enemy troops before their infantry get close enough to do any damage, and your infantry will protect the archers when the troops finally do arrive.
  • The big brain way: Research your opponents' army composition and culture by riding close (but not too close!) to their army to scout them. For example, Sturgians generally will have lots of shield infantry while Battania will have a lot of ranged folks. Figure out the counter infantry type (e.g. for shielded infantry it's heavy 2-handed weapon infantry. For heavy 2-handed infantry it's archers. For cavalry it's spear-throwers. For archers it's cavalry, etc) and fill your army with those units. Engage in wholesale slaughter. Note: This works best when you have a fief garrison you can switch veteran troops in and out of, because rookies get rekt even with a "type" advantage.
  • The OP way: Get just zillions of horse archers, select them at the start of the battle and press F6. The horse archers will run up to the enemy, fill them with arrows, then run away again and repeat. Currently there's no really effective AI counter to this and they will just bleed troops while you sit there wondering why you're even there.
  • The "No 'I' in team" way: If you're helping another noble in combat, their troops will automatically be on F6 mode. And you can't do anything about it, either. If you don't want their troops to get completely wiped out, it's best to set yours to AI mode (0 then F6) too. Otherwise they WILL charge the enemy archer wall with their 15 sturgian recruits...
  • The "Actually, my troops are more valuable" way: Conversely, if you are helping a noble but don't actually need their troops to win (i.e. you have a huge numbers advantage), don't auto send your troops and use whatever your usual strat is. They'll get wiped out but at least you won't lose your precious troops!
 
You can cheese simulated battles by abusing the "Retreat" command. Hold "Tab" to bring up the stats menu, and press middle mouse button to get your cursor back. Then you can click "Retreat" to teleport your entire army safely out of the battle. Then you can restart the battle with the number of troops remaining from before, but both armies are placed far away from each other again. Combine this with a lot of archers, and you can whittle the enemy numbers down before they reach your army and then simply retreat and start over again until the odds are solidly in your favour. This lets you overcome basically any odds so long as you ensure your opponent takes more losses than you do each time.
 
Levelling up your troops can be tricky as the experience system isn't very clear as to what gives the best troop exp. However, the following things seem to work fairly well: * Some of the Leadership perks grant lots of free exp over time. In particular, Raise the Meek will rapidly turn all of your lowest-level troops into higher-level ones over time, and the level 225 one, Companions, basically gives you the Vlandian empire troop exp bonus, which stacks with actually being Vlandian * Steamrolling fat groups of looters using "Send Troops" is relatively safe and usually awards a handful of troop upgrades each time * Beating nobles' armies when you have about a 2:1 ratio of your troops to theirs is also usually pretty safe and the higher-level troops they have with them yield much more exp * Winning a siege will be extremely costly in terms of deaths, but the troops who survive will gain tons of experience. Defending a siege will be less costly due to having the home turf advantage, but it's harder to engineer those to occur * Doing hideout raids and taking along a group of only archers is a great way to level up those 9 archers, so long as you don't aggro the entire hideout at once. Just make sure you use F4 frequently to enable/disable "Fire at will" or they WILL try to shoot bandits at the other end of the map and summon the wrath of god down on you * Keep your troop morale high by buying lots of different varieties of food. I'm not sure if morale is fully implemented yet, but you won't have the awkward issue of your troops all running from a difficult battle at least
 

Building your Clan

[NP] Your clan has a ranking in the clan screen (press L), shown at the top right. Earning renown increases this ranking, and every new level adds more soldiers to your armies and other useful clan perks to your arsenal. Max clan rank is 6, but you won't get there for a very long time. The easiest way to gain renown is through winning large battles, so battling lots will quickly raise that renown score.
 
The game doesn't tell you this anywhere, but you can have your family join your party by visiting them in whatever city they are hiding in and talking to them (or left-clicking their portrait in that city). Your brother in particular is basically a veteran soldier right from the start of the game, so adding him to your party will give you a huge early-game boost. His high steward score also increases your party size by a lot, so having him around lets you field more soldiers until your own steward score catches up. Later on, set him up as governor of your best city/settlement to give it a huge boost.
 
You can recruit companions at taverns in major cities. Not all companions are created equally, so I recommend using a companion guide to figure out which ones have skills that you want. You can also manually check their skills by right clicking the character's portrait from the city screen or searching them in the encyclopedia. That way you'll know what they are good and bad at before you go through the long dialogue with them. I personally find the tacticians/stewards most valuable as you can make them lead armies for you (more on that in a bit), and the ones with high trade are helpful because you can create caravans with them for bonus income during peacetime. You can only recruit your clan level +1 companions at a time, (e.g. 2 at clan level 1). This means you should be very picky about who you hire.
 
If you have joined a kingdom (or started your own), you can persuade other factions' nobles to betray their current faction and join yours. For this you need three things: High charm, luck and money. Save your game. Speak to the noble and say you have something to discuss. Ask about their liege. This will lead to a skill challenge where you have to get 4 successes in 4 attempts (either 100% successes or at least 1 critical success). This is entirely RNG, so choose the highest % options and pray. Or load back a lot. If they hate their monarch you'll have a very high chance of succeeding in at least 1 of the 4 challenges. Once you've successfully convinced them, you then need to bribe them. The bribe usually is about 100k denars, but can go all the way to more than a million denars if they own lots of land (because your team gets the fiefs too when they convert). Unless you're insanely rich, use the encyclopedia to find the poorest, most disenfranchised nobles and you'll discover that you might be able to pay them even a single denar and they'll happily convert. Beware, others can convert YOUR allies too, so try to make sure you give every noble at least one castle to keep them happy and on your side. Also if you save a lot and see the message that a noble has left your kingdom, you can load back and often they won't leave the second time.
 
If you release a noble whom you beat in combat instead of taking them prisoner, you will get a 6-7 point relationship increase with everyone in that noble's clan. Doing this is an excellent way to butter them up for future conversion to your kingdom.
 
Convert the head of a clan to your kingdom and their entire clan will also convert along with them!
 
You can use your influence points to put policies in place that suit you before adding others to the clan. In the Kingdom menu (K), you can go to the policy tab and scroll through the various policies there. Basically, most policies either benefit only the ruler, benefit only the vassals, or adjust your kingdom's rates (e.g. tax rate and growth rate). If you're going to start your own kingdom, take this chance to vote in all the royalty-favouring policies before you add people who disagree with you. Conversely, if you're a vassal, you want to add more vassals to the clan and THEN vote in all the vassal-favouring policies. Both of these strategies will not only increase your influence gain rate, but also make it much harder for a rogue AI to steal powecities from you later on in the game. It will also prevent you from getting disliked by other nobles from voting against their wishes since they won't even be in your kingdom yet.
 
As a male character, you can marry a noble to have her join your clan. I'm not sure if it's the reverse situation for female heroes or not (i.e. you join their clan). This provides two main benefits. One, you gain another party member to bring along in battle, and two, you can make babies (heirs) who will inherit your stuff if/when your character dies. If you end up playing for enough time you can also eventually add those heirs to your party once they've grown up enough. To woo a noble, simply profess your love to them then return and visit them a few times. You'll have to pass charm checks to woo them properly, so as always, save beforehand! Eventually they'll tell you to talk to the clan leader, and then you'll barter for their hand in marriage. Usually it's pretty cheap.
 

Kingdom/Clan Management

Did you know that war declarations can be avoided (by sort of cheating)? If you save often and then suddenly get war declared on you (or by your kingdom on someone else), just load back to that save. It's a (low) random chance for war to be declared so there's a strong likelihood that the next time you get to that point in time literally nothing will happen. This allows you to avoid all wars that you don't want! Since the game AI is so bad right now, sometimes this is the only way to save your kingdom from utter annihilation.
 
You can equip the companions in your party with awesome gear too! This took me 40 hours to realize, but on the Inventory (I) or trade screens, there are arrows at the top that let you select a different character to equip. This works with the Character (C) screen too, allowing you to assign perks or stats/skills to your companions.
 
In your clan management screen (L), under the parties tab, you can assign your companions to various roles within your party. Generally, this causes the game to act as if your own skill with that particular role is the same level as the assigned companion. For example, if you assign a companion with 80 medicine skill as surgeon, the game will cause you and your troops to heal as if you had 80 medicine skill. Keep in mind that if you don't assign a party member to a role then you will gain the exp for doing that role. In other words, it's a trade-off between gaining free experience and having your party be more effective on the campaign map. The one role in your party you definitely don't want to assign a companion to is Quartermaster, because that trains the Steward skill which you want to raise as high as possible.
 
You can create separate parties under your clan management screen's "Parties" tab. This allows you to send companions off to raise armies and gain exp all on their own without your intervention. You can also assign them to their own personal role within that party (even the Quartermaster role!) for bonus exp and it won't affect your own exp. Parties have three major benefits that make them very useful. Firstly, they will recruit their own troops for you! The max party size is dependent on the companion's steward skill and your clan rank. This means that with enough time you can create an allied party that's virtually equal in size to your own army. Secondly, those parties can be summoned to your army on a whim (click the flag icon down the bottom right of the screen - you must be in a kingdom to do this) and it costs 0 influence! Thirdly, the parties automatically will go around fighting battles for you and increasing your own influence and reputation. I highly recommend creating at least a few parties. There's a few downsides to be aware of, however. Firstly, you pay all the troop wages for the other parties. This can get VERY expensive if you're not at war and constantly defeating armies for money. Secondly, like any roaming entity, your companions can get attacked and captured by enemy armies. If that happens, you have to wait for them to escape or be ransomed and then track them down in whichever city they end up in to reclaim your companion. This can be very annoying. Lastly, if you're a vassal, your liege can actually summon your companions to their army, thereby using your hard-earned troops for their own personal gain! That's the price of being a vassal though.
 
Sometimes you cannot assign roles to party members through the clan screen. This tends to happen if you assign a companion to a role and they die in battle. If this happens, instead select them in the party screen (P) and talk to them. You can assign them roles from the conversation menu instead.
 

Making Money

[NP] In the early-game you will find the tournaments in city arenas to be almost impossible to win. However, with the power of save/load and determination, you can win big in tournaments by betting on yourself every round. If you win the tournament, not only will you get a sweet prize but you will also be several thousand denars richer. At least until your reputation catches up to you and they start offering less and less money for your bets.
 
The best way to make money in Bannerlord is smithing (once you've unlocked enough recipes and have about 140 smithing skill). Early on, the stuff you produce is worthless, but as you start making tier 4 and higher weapons you will discover combinations that create weapons work up to 100k denars in value! Make a handful of these and you can go around from city to city, buying up all the expensive armor while still walking away with 20k+ more denars each time. There are many guides to smithing that can be found elsewhere, but here's a few minor tips:
  • Try not to sell anything you make that's worth less than 10k denars. Otherwise you will encounter these items as arena prizes which will generally make it harder to get the rare arena prizes (e.g. special horses and armour). Instead, smelt it down.
  • 2h swords and javelins seem to be a great money maker once you hit T4+
  • Smelt the weapons you loot from battles if you need the materials for smithing. Even worthless rusty iron spathas can be broken down into huge amounts of valuable materials.
  • No matter how many days pass from traveling, none of that will allow you to be able to smelt again once you've hit the limit. This means that even if you come back 3 months later, if you haven't rested in any villages or settlements in that time, you will not be able to continue smelting. You MUST click "Wait here for a while" and just sit around for a day or so to get all of your smithing stamina back.
  • Weapons worth 100k make decent bribes for bringing nobles over to your side, but expect about a 30% value loss when using them this way. If you just straight up give them money it's cheaper overall.
  • Smithed weapons are not necessarily better than the ones you can buy. Sometimes they will be, but smithing mostly gives you the ability to trade off damage types and attack speed on weapons. For example, you can increase a sword's length and swing damage but it will reduce it's swing speed and thrust. In other words, smithing is useful for making very specialized weapons, but not for making some OP magical sword of head-lopping.
 
The second-best way to make money is by thrashing other nobles in combat. If you're at war, target every enemy noble you see whom you can easily beat and trounce them. Not only do you get money and items for beating them, you can also ransom them at taverns for even more money. You also get money when you capture cities in sieges. Naturally, when you're at peace, you'll find it much harder to make money this way.
 
You can purchase workshops in cities and have them produce goods for a small profit (around 75-125 denars per day). It generally costs about 13k denars to buy a workshop, so it won't become profitable for approximately 140 days. Because of this, if you wish to use workshops you should select cities which you are unlikely to be at war with for a long time (e.g. your own faction's cities!). After all, if you end up at war with a faction, all of your workshops in that faction are stolen from you. To buy a workshop you must physically walk around town. If you hold alt you will see three semi-random workshops throughout the city (e.g. wine press, brewery, smithy). If you walk to one of these shops during the day you will find NPCs loitering around nearby called "Shop Worker". Talk to the shop worker and tell them you want to purchase the workshop.
 
To decide which workshops to build in which city, examine the fiefs which feed into that city. You can also use a workshop guide, but I find these aren't always correct due to frequent patches. The bottom line is this: Pick a city which has at least one source of workshop materials (e.g. grain, sheep, hardwood) in its settlements. More than one source is even better. Next, buy a workshop and select the type that uses that material. For example, grain is used by breweries, and wood is used by a wood workshop etc. Then, you wait. You can check the workshop's profitability from the clan tab (L), but remember, don't expect it to become super profitable anytime soon. These are long-term investments.
 
Another way to make money is caravans. Caravans are more profitable than workshops, but come with significant risk, especially if you're at war with anyone. Basically, you assign a companion to manage a caravan (which costs 15000-25000 denars to make depending on the troops you assign), and the caravan will travel from city to city buying and selling goods. Companions with high Trade skills are essential here. While travelling, the caravans can be attacked by looters, bandits, and worst, enemy armies. If the caravan is captured, you'll have to go rescue your companion or wait for them to be released. Then you'll have to spend another 15-25k to get the caravan going again. Basically, don't do this if you're a warmonger. Anyway, to form a caravan, talk to any merchant in a city and choose the "I want to form a caravan in this city" option. Caravans will net you varying amounts of money, and the income will not be every day, but in my experience they are more profitable than workshops and much more annoying to keep track of.
 
If you have a high trade skill, instead of making caravans you can be a caravan. Load up on sumpter horses which increase your max load, and then use trade rumours (talk to civilians hanging out in town markets) to determine the best places to buy and sell stuff. Buy low, travel, sell high. If you make 30 denars per sale and sell 100 trade items, that's 3k of profit. If you make 100 denars per sale, that's 30k profit! Again, keep in mind that cities generally only keep 20k-30k denars on them at a time, so if you take too many goods you will not be able to sell them all.
 

Siege Warfare

Holding the alt key highlights both important people and weapons that are lying around. You can use this during sieges to replenish ranged ammo and locate nearby interactible things.
 
You can use the siege weapons that your army/city has built. This will train your throwing skill and also open some neat opportunities. For example, you can use catapults to smash siege towers! It takes 4 hits to achieve but boy is it worth it!
 
Catapults and trebuchets can be aimed left and right but also have a red gauge on the side which affects the distance that your shots travel. You can change this bar using W/S to choose how close or far to shoot. Generally you want the distance to be less than half the red bar because your targets are a lot closer than the range on the siege engines.
 
When defending a city you will notice piles of rocks (called merlons) lying around upstairs in the gatehouse. You can take these rocks and drop them on enemy troops for massive damage (400+). You can also use them to smash the battering ram with a few good throws, thereby protecting your gates.
 
You can place your troops before a siege by pressing the numbers (e.g. 1 for infantry) and then clicking where you want them to go. However they just run back to where the AI would have put them anyway, so it's not worth it right now. But someday it might actually work as intended!
 
Is the castle you were staying in being beseiged by overwhelming numbers? You can sally forth to attack, use archers to pick some troops off, and then retreat from battle before their enormous army starts hacking your party apart. Repeat this about a dozen times and you'll have a much more manageable enemy to fight, with very few casualties on your side. For the love of god though save before you try this. Also note that, due to a bug, when you sally out of the castle you'll be plonked onto the overworld map when you retreat and won't be able to get back in without sacrificing troops.
 

Misc

  • Save often. Make multiple save files so that you can jump back in time up to half a year if need be. Sometimes bad decisions (e.g. a war with a much stronger faction) take a long time to bite you in the ass.
  • Buy lots of (non-sumpter) horses. As long as you have at least a 1:1 horse to troop ratio, your campaign movement speed will be hugely increased, allowing you to chase and catch foes must more easily.
    • Although the tutorial teaches you to buy grain, don't just buy grain. Instead, buy even amounts of every food you can find. That means grain, dates, beer, cheese, butter, oil, meat, fish etc. This will do two things: Grant you huge amounts of Quartermaster exp every day, and also keep your troop morale maxed out, meaning they won't run like cowards from a difficult fight
    • If you can get your leadership to 125, you can unlock the "Disciplinarian" perk. This allows you to promote bandits into regular military units, which at the minimum makes them as useful as recruits. Some bandits, however, can become very powerful military units, such as bushwhackers, freebooters and forest bandits turning into the much-beloved Battanian Fian Champions!

THINGS NOT TO DO

  • Don't give anyone the dragon banner before you're ready to fight the whole world. That also applies to founding your own kingdom by completing the relevant quest.
  • Don't put companions in the Quartermaster role of your party. Otherwise you deprive yourself of an easy way to gain Steward exp, which increases your troop size.
  • Don't buy workshops in cities you plan on warring with anytime soon, because once war is declared you automatically lose those workshops.
  • Don't make caravans if you want to go to war a lot. The enemy nobles will target your caravans mercilessly.
  • Don't leave siege weapons you've built out in the open to get destroyed one by one. Instead, click on the weapon immediately once it's finished and choose "Send to reserve". Once you have 4 weapons built, place them all simultaneously and watch the mayhem unfold!
  • Don't fight battles where your army strengths are similar (unless it's really important to do so e.g. you're defending your own fiefs against a siege). You will lose a lot of good troops this way, and if you instead fight easy battles you'll get way more rewards with way less casualties in the long run.
  • Don't execute nobles unless you want to make the game harder on yourself. They breed like rabbits and everyone hates you when you execute someone. Plus there's a good chance they'll execute you too if they capture you in a fight after that. Releasing other nobles grants the most benefit to you by far, even if it's not as satisfying.
 
And... that's it for now! I'm sure I forgot some tips but I'll edit them in as I remember. At the very least it should open up some new gameplay avenues for some people, and maybe make things a little less stupid for others. If you made it to the end of this very long post: well done!
submitted by whyismywatchstopped to Bannerlord [link] [comments]


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The following description is not provided by this sub or any of it's contributors.
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submitted by SuperHotUKDeals to SuperHotUKDeals [link] [comments]


2020.09.18 09:44 XMG_gg XMG Gaming Laptops: First Steps & Troubleshooting

So you got yourself an XMG Gaming Laptop laptop, huh?

Congratulations! :-)
Follow this handy guide to go through your first steps and some commonly recurring questions. This guide is pretty long and might look frightening on first look, but please note:

+++ BREAKING: Fix "No Speaker" issue on XMG FUSION 15 +++

Windows Update has recently brought us a "No speakers, no sound" issue on XMG FUSION 15. Please read all about the solution in this post. This should only be a temporary condition and solved soon by pulling the incompatible driver from Windows Update. Update: incompatible driver has been pulled on May 19, 2020. New driver going to be rolled out shortly.

Now, moving on to the actual content of this thread:

I unboxed my XMG Laptop – what are my first steps?

1. If you purchased with Windows.
When building our laptops, we always make sure to install the latest firmware and drivers. If you purchased with Windows, all drivers will already be installed and you can pretty much start working. NVIDIA updates their driver pretty often, so they might already have a new driver out. Open up GeForce Experience, log into your account and see if the app offers any driver updates.
2. If you purchased without operating system.
Your SSD will be empty, but your firmware will be up to date. Even if you purchase without operating system, we will already have updated the latest BIOS and latest Thunderbolt firmware. Now it’s time to install Windows and install our drivers.
If you don’t have your own Windows install media at hand, you can get the latest official version from here. The drivers for your XMG Laptop will be on a USB thumb drive in your shipping box. If you want to make absolutely sure that you’re getting the latest drivers, download them each by each from our download portal. Both sources will include a PDF file that will guide you through each step. The only tricky step is the Audio driver, where you’ll have to do a specific install and reboot sequence. This is explained in detail in the PDF file.

++ Troubleshooting (all models) +++

The following items might apply to any XMG or SCHENKER model. In fact, they might also apply to laptops from other brands. Further down below, you'll find a section that is more specific to individual models.

My battery life is less than it should be / I have high Idle power consumption / my dGPU is not turning off.

Battery life and power consumption are closely interconnected. If your system consumes too much power – even in Idle – your battery life will suffer.
Preliminary: check your CPU usage, sorted by tasks
Your first look should be into Windows Task Manager, tab "Details" and then sort by "CPU" usage. You should know that your CPU has multiple cores and threads. For example, on i7-9750H (6 cores, 12 threads) if one single-thread task is running at 100%, it translates to "only" 8% CPU load in Task Manager (100 divided by 12 = 8.33). 8% might not look like much at first glance. But in reality it's one core that is running at maximum speed, taking almost as much power as if all cores would run at the same time. This is because the CPU would boost a single core to much higher speed than it would boost all cores together.
In other words: CPU usage values in Task Manager can be misleading, especially if some broken or badly programmed software is going rogue on a single thread. Do the math!
So, on a 6 core CPU, if you have any process in Task Manager constantly running at 8%, something is off. Please identify which task it is, and either end it right there it or uninstall the related software altogether.
Another way to check is to separate the Task Manager CPU activity graph into logical cores. Check these two screenshots:
In my example you can see one core in the middle was almost maxed out for a short amount of time. Thanks to the nature of Turbo Boost, this core would induce a boosted clock speed, leading to almost maxed-out power consumption and high temperatures. This is not always immediately visible because most programs would keep jumping from core to core, so you always see individual spikes to 100% on single core. You can try this yourself by using Prime95 and running it on only 1 thread.
All systems nominal? CPU is nice and idle? Check the dGPU status.
If you don't have any rogue tasks clogging up you CPU but your Idle power consumption is still off the charts, it might be because your NVIDIA GPU (dedicated GPU, dGPU) is not turning itself off.
Under the system of NVIDIA Optimus (MSHybrid), all common Windows apps are run on the Intel UHD Graphics (integrated GPU, iGPU) by default and the dedicated GPU (dGPU) should turn itself off when it is not needed. This removes the dGPU from the power source but it also saves power on the CPU side, because the CPU can turn off the PCI-Express x16 dGPU connection and thus achieve lower sleep states in each CPU cycle. This system can be disturbed in a number of ways, leading to higher power consumption which in turn leads to lower battey life.
1. Check which system monitoring tools you are running in the background
Some system monitoring software intentionally wakes up the dGPU. Keeping such software running in the background will inevitably lead to higher power consumption. We will keep a list of tools here which do and which do not keep the dGPU awake.
Does not keep the dGPU awake Keeps the dGPU awake
CoreTemp AIDA64 (only when “Sensor” pane is open)
HWiNFO64 ASUS GPU Tweak II
Intel Extreme Tuning Utility CPUID HWMonitor
NVIDIA Control Panel MSI Afterburner
Speccy NVIDIA GeForce Experience
TechPowerUp Real Temp NVIDIA Inspector
ThrottleStop NZXT CAM
Windows Task Manager Open Hardware Monitor
TechPowerUp GPU-Z
XMG Control Center (only when “System Monitor” pane is open)
Please check if any of the programs on the right side of the table is running in the background on your machine. If they are, please remove them from Startup in the Task Manager.
Some of the programs on the left side of the table might wake up the dGPU once for a few seconds during initialization. But according to our testing, they won’t keep the dGPU awake during normal operation.
If you want to see, whether or not your dGPU is awake or not, the best bet is to use the “Sensors” function in HWiNFO64 and keep an eye on the GPU Temperature of your NVIDIA GeForce card. If the temperature reads 0°C, the dGPU is sleeping. With a right click on the Temperature value, you can even set up an alarm in form of a sound file, notification popup or logfile entry if the temperature reaches a value ≥ 1.
2. If external monitor is connected, dGPU will be awake.
Both HDMI and USB-C/DisplayPort/Thunderbolt are connected directly to the NVIDIA GeForce card. This dedicated connection gives the XMG FUSION 15 the power to drive very high resolutions, refresh rates and to support G-SYNC and FreeSync on external screens. The trade-off: the dGPU will always be awake as soon as an external monitor is connected. Rendering can still happen on the iGPU (Intel UHD Graphics) - but the dGPU will always be "awake" to deliver the pixels to the screen.
3. The choice of running apps on iGPU vs. dGPU has to be done in Windows Graphics settings now.
Microsoft is taking over the NVIDIA Optimus (MSHybrid) control from NVIDIA. On latest Windows builds and NVIDIA drivers, the NVIDIA driver now shoes a very small warning notification:
Windows OS now manages selection of the graphics processor. Open Windows graphics settings
If you notice that certain apps wake up the dGPU, please see if you can assign them to the internal graphics in this new Windows setting dialogue. Please note that the aforementioned benchmark and system monitoring apps apps will override/ignore this setting anyway. But it should work fine for most if not all productivity apps and games.
4. Every app is running on dGPU as soon as external monitor is connected? No.
NVIDIA’s Control Center has a hidden function called “NVIDIA GPU Activity” which supposedly shows which app is being rendered on the dGPU. You can find it by enabling "Display GPU Activity Monitor Icon in Notification Area".
Unfortunately, this function is not accurate when using an external monitor. As soon as you have an external monitor connected, the notification window shows every newly launched app as if it’s being rendered on the dGPU, even though it is not. This has been confirmed by our NVIDIA contacts to be a general issue that affects all laptops with NVIDIA Optimus (MSHybrid) of every brand.
It does not look as if NVIDIA has any plans to resolve this issue. Therefor, the “NVIDIA GPU Activity” will continue to show inaccurate information and should rather not be used at all.
5. dGPU does not go back to sleep after disconnecting external screen while browser is open
If you launch your browser (Chrome, Firefox, Edge) while you are connected to an external screen, the browser’s hardware acceleration will use the dGPU. This happens despite the fact that you are forcing that app to run on Integrated Graphics. If the browser keeps running after you connect the external screen, it will keep the dGPU awake.
Even sending the laptop to Standby and waking it up again won’t change that fact. The dGPU will only go back to sleep after you close the specific app that triggered this behaviour.
This seems to affect every laptop with NVIDIA Optimus (MSHybrid) – not only XMG laptops.
We have filed a report with NVIDIA and we are awaiting their feedback.
Here is a short list of apps that are affected and not affected by this issue:
Affected Not affected (Control Group)
Google Chrome Microsoft Word
Mozilla Firefox notepad.exe
Microsoft Edge
This might also affect other apps if they are secretly using the dGPU for Hardware Acceleration. But so far, the 3 major browsers are the only apps we have confirmed to trigger this behaviour.
According to what we heard, NVIDIA does not seem to have any plans to fix this issue on a fundamental basis.
Workaround #1: Restart your Browser
Close your browser and launch it again after disconnecting from the external screen.
Workaround #2: Disable Hardware Acceleration in Browser
You can find this in the Settings menu of your Browser.
Workaround #3: Disable and re-enable the dGPU instead of closing your Webbrowser
Download here: dGpuCycle Script.zip
Written by Notebookcheck user ‘Stepon’ (source). You can open the script with Notepad to read the source code.
After disconnecting the external screen, run this Batch Script with Admin privileges. The script will disable and re-enable the dGPU in Device Manager. During that moment, your browser will drop the Hardware Acceleration from dGPU and go back to iGPU. Chrome will flicker for a fraction of a second. If you play any videos on your browser while running the script, you might have to restart playback by jumping to a different point in the video timeline.
With some programming skills can be further automated to always run in the background.
6. Same as above, but for most if not all apps that use a browser engine underneath.
The browser hardware acceleration issue applies to apps that are using a browser engine to create their GUI. If you launch such an app while you're connected to an external monitor, they will use the dGPU for hardware acceleration and won't let go of it until you either close the app or manually disable the dGPU. The most popular such apps are:
The most widespread framework for such apps is Electron, but it's not limited to that. For example, Spotify uses a different implementation, based on Chromium browser engine.
We are not aware of any way to disable hardware acceleration on these apps. Disabling hardware acceleration in your browser won't affect those apps. The only workarounds are:
As with other root causes in this section, this seems to apply to every laptop with NVIDIA Optimus. We have asked NVIDIA to comment in April 2020.
7. Outdated Killer Wi-Fi driver increasing power consumption.
We had a report where an outdated Killer Wi-Fi suite caused high background CPU load. If you are using a Rivet Networks Killer Wi-Fi module, please download and install the latest drivers here.
8. Missing NVIDIA USB-C and Audio drivers keep the dGPU awake?
We have a report from a user who made a custom install of NVIDIA drivers and unselected the NVIDIA USB-C and Audio drivers because he thought we won't need them. In this case, not having those drivers will cause the main driver to not shutdown the dGPU when searching for those two drivers. We were not able to reproduce it but we'll leave it in this guide for future reference. Solution: reinstall NVIDIA drivers and include every driver, even the optional ones.
9. Outdated Windows and firmware?
If you haven’t already, make sure you are running the latest Windows updates and the latest BIOS. Some major Windows milestones (also called “Redstone” updated) need to be triggered manually by opening Windows Updates, then “Checking for updates”. Under “Optional updates”, there might be a “Feature update” which you can initiate with “Download and install now” (screenshot).
10. Third party PCIe/NVMe SSD preventing CPU from sleeping?
We had recently a few reports on budget SSDs from smaller brands preventing the CPU from reaching C8 sleep states, severely cutting battery life. If you upgrades your SSD yourself with a model that is not listed in our online shop, please consider to swap it out, re-install Windows from scratch and try again. If you found your SSD to be the culprit, please share the product name with us.
11. Corsair iCue Software causes +10W power consumption?
We have seen this report from multiple users. This one was the first:
I spent a week trying to figure out why the processor on my Fusion 15 was consuming so much power when idle (around 10W!). My battery life was absolutely abysmal at about 2.5 hours on a full charge. I thought I had ruled out the iCue software because I closed the app completely, but it turns out only a complete uninstall will allow everything to return to normal so it must have been the mouse driver itself rather than the iCue software.
Source
We haven't checked it ourselves but any kind of hardware-related 3rd party software could potentially cause power saving issues on any system.
12. Epic Games Launcher running on dGPU
First reported here]. Solution is in the top reply to that thread.
13. Paint 3D causes the dGPU to stay 'ON' by running in the Background, even after Reboot
This seems to be a real issue based on a bug from Microsoft. Check this thread for details.
14. Other reason? Cannot reach CPU Package C8 Residency? Please take part in our survey
Please read this post for an introduction into CPU Package C8 Residency states. The post includes a link to a survey to collect analytical data from users who just can't get their power consumption down despite already having implemented all prior suggestions.
15. Dig deeper? Check out this amazing in-depth guide about Windows power saving optimization and C-States.
Written by user Che0063 on Notebookreview in 2018 and constantly updated into 2020, this guide is a deep dive into all things C-States.
You can find a PDF copy (pulled on 2020/05/26) of this guide here.

Random short spikes in lag and stutter

Intel Driver and Support Assistant (DSA) is acting up, causing CPU spikes up to 40% every 1-5 minutes.
Taken from this post:
Intel Driver and Support Assistant (DSA) is acting up, causing CPU spikes up to 40% every 1-5 minutes. See this picture of task manager cumulative CPU time. Funny you already mentioned that it stopped working, as I experienced the same thing.
Solution (TL;DR):
Uninstall Intel DSA for now. You can do this via the windows Apps and Programs, or if it fails for any reason, download the official Uninstaller from the intel website.
[...]

My laptop randomly wakes up from Standby.

1. Firmware solution for Wake-up 3 hours after entering Sleep/Standby. (XMG FUSION 15 only)
There was an issue with the NVIDIA USB-C driver which caused the laptop to wake up exactly 3 hours after entering Standby. The laptop was trying to transition into Hibernate (Suspend to Disk) but failed to do so. This issue is resolved in BIOS 0062 and beyond.
2. Disable Wake timers (applies to any PC and Laptop)
Depending on your Windows configuration, there might be certain task schedules (including Windows Updates) which prompt the laptop to wake-up from Sleep or Hibernate. To check on these issues, please read this article. The most common solution is to disable the “Allow wake timers” option for both “plugged in” and “on-battery”. Please note: this setting depends on each power profile and your laptop has three of them: Silent, Balanced, Enthusiast. Please switch to each of these profiles and modify “Allow wake timer” in the Advanced settings in Windows power options for each one of these.
3. Check the Wake-up cause
There is a simple command that will tell you the reason why your laptop woke up for the last time. Usually this is something like "Power Button" or "Lid Opening", but in your case it might point to a different driver or Windows component. Find "Command Prompt" in Start Menu and type:
powercfg -lastwake 
This command does not need Admin right. Please copy it by marking the output text and pressing Enter. The marked text from the Command Prompt windows is now in your clipboard and can be pasted into a text file or message box. Alternatively you can take a picture and report back to us.

My laptop needs a long time to boot up.

Cold Boot and Wake-up from Hibernate should not take much more than 12 seconds between pressing the power button and seeing the login screen wallpaper. If your laptop takes much longer, please consider the following options.
1. Enable “Fast Boot”.
Enabling “Fast Boot” in BIOS is a requirement to use Microsoft’s “Hybrid Boot” technology which saves a lot of time on Cold Boot. Before shipping, we always enable “Fast Boot” in all XMG laptops – but it might get disabled by user operation. On some models, it might also get disabled during BIOS Reset. To make sure, you have “Fast Boot” enabled, follow these steps:
(the location of the "Fast Boot" option might be slightly, depending on your model)
2. Flash firmware again
You can clearly seperate the boot process between BIOS time and Windows time. Everything that happens before you see the XMG boot logo is BIOS time. On XMG FUSION 15, it usually takes about 7 seconds between pressing the power button and seeing the XMG boot logo for the first time. If this time period is much, much longer in your case, the root cause might be in hardware or firmware.
One potential solution was found in this post. This user already had a system with Thunderbolt Firmware NVM v56. But based on a hunch, he just tried to update the same firmware again and it instantly fixed his long BIOS time.
It makes kind of sense. VBIOS, Thunderbolt... those are large, complex and kind of external components that are initialized in the very early steps of the the BIOS. If anything is stalling there, you won't see the boot logo because the BIOS hasn't even attempted yet to start talking to the SSD.
Rule of thumb: if you have long BIOS time before you see the XMG logo, please consider to flash the BIOS and the Thunderbolt Firmware again.
Now, let's look at various Windows-based causes:
3. Clean up TEMP folders
Taken from this post.
Found out, during each boot Windows (namely it's ProfSvc service) takes everything you have in users/yourprofile folder and writes over those files. I suspect it's changing some meta data in the files. Probably edditing read/write premissions. But it goes one by one. And logon process waits for it to finish. As long as your computer is relatively clean, this operation takes a second or two. But when Visual Studio update "forgets" 160 000 files in your AppData/Temp folder, it results in 35 secs of profile loading during boot. All I needed was to empty the Temp folder and the bootups are back in normal!
You can either clean the Temp folders manually or use a software like CCleaner. Please beware, we would only recommend CCleaner to clean temp files, but don't clean the Windows Registry. It's usually safe to do but it can sometimes lead to false positive situations and side-effects.
4. Riot Games 'Vanguard' might block one of our drivers
If you have game titles from Riot Games installed, the software 'Vanguard' might be blocking the 'inpoutx64.sys' driver on some of our systems. This driver is related to the Control Center. We have heard of one single case where the presence of Vanguard lead to a significantly increased boot-time. In other cases however, it had no effect despite getting the 'Vanguard has blocked' message in Windows.
We will share this information with our ODM to see if our signed inpoutx64.sys/dll can be whitelisted. Meanwhile, please consider disabling or uninstalling Vanguard to see if it improves your boot time.
5. Consider a clean reinstall
It might be inconvenient, but if you have any boot times that are wildly longer than above reference data, please consider a clean Windows installation. 'Clean' means deleting the system partitions on your SSD in the first step of the installation procedure. Before you do this, you should backup all important data on external storage.
6. Other causes.
If your system still takes a long time to even display the XMG boot logo or to boot into the Login prompt, there might be another issue at hand. Please make sure to update your BIOS, load setup defaults, enable “Fast Boot” again and make sure that your Windows and drivers are up to date. Please also consider to follow the generic advice in this article.
There is currently no other known systematic issue that prevents our laptops from doing a fast boot or fast wake-up. If you cannot resolve the issue on your machine, please consider to backup your data and do a clean Windows re-install.
7. Discussion
For XMG FUSION 15 we have opened a dedicated tread about expected boot times after a clean install. Please move all relevant discussion to this thread:
Thank you!

My microphone does not sound right

(I might be using Discord)
First, please make sure you increased the microphone gain to 100% and added the +20dB boost.
Now, some apps including Discord put additional processing on the microphone, including echo and noise cancellation. This can have a negative effect on microphone audio quality. Please see if you can disable all such options from your chat application and from the Realtek Control Panel.

I have random Bluescreens

Bluescreens can have a number of reasons. Sometimes, the error message or driver reference can already point at a root cause. If there are too many possible root causes, here are some generic tips.
How to use MemTest86 to test my RAM
Follow these steps:
PRO TIP: If you have MemTest86 errors, you can try to open your laptop and test both memory modules individually. Remove one module and run the test again. If the errors only show on one of the modules, try the same module again in the other (empty) RAM slot. If the module shown errors when run individually in both of the RAM slots, it might be indeed faulty.
If the RAM modules are actually not faulty, it can sometimes also help to just remove and replace (reseat) them. Sometimes, if they are not properly connected, they might also prompt random errors including iGPU graphics artifacts.

+++ Troubleshooting XMG FUSION 15 (2019) +++

The following items apply only to XMG FUSION 15. Please check first if your issue is covered under the general section above. The latest BIOS and Control Center update can be found in this thread.

My speaker sound is underwhelming / I cannot get Soundblaster Connect running.

Sound Blaster Connect is an important app to improve the experience of the audio system. It can increase volume (SmartVol) and Bass of the speakers.
1. Reinstall Audio drivers in the proper sequence
Normally, when all pre-requisites are met, Soundblaster Connect should install automatically from Windows. You can then find it with a simple search for “Sound Blaster” in the Windows Start menu. If Sound Blaster Connect is no where to be found or if it only shows an empty screen, please follow the sequence precisely:
If you are connected to the Internet, the system will now automatically install "Sound Blaster Connect" from Microsoft Store. This might take a few minutes or more. When in doubt, reboot once more after the Soundblaster-Creative_Audio_Effects.

My touchpad sometimes does not react.

This is a very rare issue that we have encountered a few times. For some users we have fixed it by replacing the laptop. The root cause is not entirely clear yet but there have been a few successful workarounds.
Solution #1: Set Touchpad to “Most Sensitive”
Find the “Touchpad” settings in Windows Start menu and change the sensitivity setting to “Most Sensitive”. Please report via PM with your order number if this fixes the issue for you.
Solution #2: Reinstall BIOS and Control Center
We have reports from users who got rid of any Touchpad issues by reinstalling the BIOS and Control Center. Please get the appropriate downloads from our Download Portal.

My CPU shows high activity in idle while having devices connected to USB-C port.

We are currently tracking an issue where users have reported >10% CPU usage in Idle while having certain devices connected to the USB-C port.
Current Workaround: Disable Automatic Sleep on Thunderbolt controller
Device Manager > System devices > Thunderbolt Controller > Power Management > Disable "Allow the computer to turn off this device to save power"

I’m unable to turn off my keyboard backlight during boot.

Normally, if you disable the keyboard backlight in Control Center using the slider switch, it should also be disabled during Reboot, Cold Boot etc. We had one report of a rare issue where this settings was not applied to firmware anymore. If you encounter this issue, please click the “Restore” button in Control Center to reset all you Keyboard Backlight settings. Then, try again to disable the Keyboard Backlight and reboot.

My keyboard backlight is not turning on anymore.

We had a few reports of keyboard backlight not being able to turn on anymore. If you encounter this issue, please reset your BIOS settings.

I cannot access my BIOS Setup (F2) anymore.

This is another very rare issue that was only reported once so far. If you cannot access your BIOS Setup, you cannot do a BIOS Reset anymore.
Solution: Remove CMOS Jumper from Mainboard and Reboot
The mainboard of XMG FUSION 15 has a jumper to control the BIOS Reset. In order to reach this jumper, you will need to remove the bottom case of the laptop. This is as easy as removing the 10 screws on the bottom side and then simply lifting the bottom cover away from the laptop.
The jumper is located next to the WiFi module
If the jumper is removed, the laptop will show a special menu after on boot which will allow you to reset the BIOS Settings to Default.
After having done this Reset, please place the jumper again it it's original position, connecting pins "1" and "2" as seen in the "Top View" picture linked above.
Now, please see if you can now get back into BIOS Setup with the F2 key during boot.

My external USB mouse sometimes stops moving.

We have some reports from USB gaming mouse with ≥1000Hz polling rate that sometimes stop working when used together with USB hubs, both on USB-A and USB-C (Thunderbolt).
Please install the latest official drivers from your mouse vendor and see if you can reduce the polling rate to 500Hz to see if it makes any difference.

My system consumes about 1~2% battery in Standby/Sleep mode

This is normal and also affects both XMG FUSION and XMG NEO series with opto-mechanical keyboard. Reason: the keyboard consumes slightly over 1W even in standby, because it is still firing up the Infrared barriers for every individual switch. This is to make sure that the keyboard can wake the system from standby. This translates to a power consumption (witch charger, measured at wall socket) of up to 1.8W in Standby if the battery is already fully charged. Due to a hardware design constraint, the power of the keyboard switches cannot be turned off, unless the system is sent to Hibernate (S4) or Shutdown (S5).
Workaround: use Hibernate. By default, Standby automatically transitions into Hibernate after 180 minutes. You can shorten this timespan in the Advanced Power Options in Windows (Screenshot). You have to do this for each of the Performance Profiles that you use (Silent, Balanced, Enthusiast). Before that, you have to enable Hibernate in this menu.

I would like to improve my DPC Latencies.

For guaranteed low DPC latencies, please check out our SCHENKER Audio Editions. For all other models, we're going to collect a number of tips here over time.

I have issues with USB-C or Thunderbolt 3 adapters on XMG FUSION 15

XMG FUSION 15 (2019, XFU15L19) had a bit of a shaky history with some USB-C adapters and Thunderbolt Docking Stations. It seems like the most serious issues have been ironed out with BIOS 0064 and Thunderbolt Firmware-Update NVM v56. If you plan to use USB-C port and you purchased your laptop before May 2020, please make sure to update your firmware as explained in this thread:
If you are still not sure which USB-C peripherals to buy, please check out our list of validated products in this thread:
Thank you!


That's all, folks.

For more FAQ on XMG, SCHENKER and Bestware, please check our FAQ Page: https://bestware.com/faqs/
If we find more commonly asked questions (especially ones that are specific to popular models), we will add them to this guide.
If you have any questions or issues that are not covered in this guide, please reply in the comments below!
// Tom
submitted by XMG_gg to XMG_gg [link] [comments]


2020.09.18 08:19 WinterLamon Creepy curb crawler

This happened years ago, I was using a Motorola flip phone so that might help date it for you. I was on the last train home from a night out in Manchester, the train got in around 11:40 and I had about a mile walk to get home. This is a very familiar route along a main road, but I lived in a pretty small suburban town so by that time the roads were dead. The other passengers quickly dispersed and I found myself walking home alone. I hadn't really noticed how quiet it was as I was on my phone talking with a friend. I became aware of a beat up old car creeping alongside me at my walking pace and a guy with a gut looking at me from the drivers seat, I couldn't make out any facial features in the dark and he was alone in the car. I remember the car was a mess, rubbish on the dash, just really messy. I was suddenly on high alert, this wasn't normal. For some reason I ended my conversation as I wanted to keep my wits about me, but in hindsight I probably should have stayed on the phone.
I looked at the guy and shrugged and made signs for him to drive on and leave me alone. He just kept on driving at my pace, his face, now lit up by street lights, was expressionless. This went on for a few excruciating minutes and then all of a sudden he sped off. I relaxed thinking he was just messing with me he had had his fun and now he is driving off. I then saw him turn into the petrol station up ahead. The petrol station was closed, all lights off and there was no reason for him to pull in there. It was also right on my route home, I would have to pass it. Everything was telling me NOT to walk past, he was waiting for me. I then held back and decided to call my friend who lived nearby and he said he'd be right out to meet me, he was in bed though so I needed to give him a couple of mins to get dressed and get out to me.
I waited by a bank and obviously didn't walk past the petrol station, he hadn't come out in this time, he was still in there. When an amount of time had passed and I hadn't walked by, the car pulled out and headed towards me again. I was freaking out now. The guy then just parked up right next to where I was stood just staring at me. He didn't make any moves to get out of the car. I then start to run in the direction my friend would be coming from and he started following me again, again going at my pace. Luckily I see my friend running towards me, I guess the driver saw him too, as he then speeds up and drives away.
I think he was just trying to fuck with me but it does creep me out wondering what would have happened if I had walked past the petrol station that night.
submitted by WinterLamon to creepyencounters [link] [comments]


2020.09.18 04:46 JordanandLianne System Update : 9-2020

[Hello Everybuddy!
We've been totally absent for a good 2 months. So we figured we'd drop a post to give an update as to what's been going on and where we're at with things.]
After we made our new google/reddit account near the end of June we went quiet for what we thought would only be a few days. The plan was to simply take a short time out as we transferred all of our documents and projects over... But nothing could have prepared us for what July and August had in store.

What Happened? Why Did We Go Quiet?

[So, our little leave of absence can be summed up in a single word:
Interference
Interference is our fancy pants terminology for when the host and tulpa experience difficulty in communication and/or imposition when those are otherwise very strong, well established features within the system.]
It's a frustrating experience to say the least. One day you're talking back and forth like normal, then the next day communicating becomes oddly difficult. Your tulpa suddenly feels distant for some inexplicable reason. Their presence in your life and your overall experience of them feels weakened, almost like it's deteriorating. If you practice imposition then you'll find that you start getting weird glitches and hiccups in visual and auditory imposition- or that all imposition fails entirely... But it can get worse.
If the interference between the two of you becomes bad enough, you eventually cross a line into what we call Total Interference.
[Total interference is a COMPLETE disruption in imposition and communication... It's a total breakdown of the system's normal capabilities and functioning, resulting in a sense of utter separation between tulpa and host.
The host feels as a singlet again, wholly alone in their skull. The tulpa on the other hand is still there, yet can't be perceived in ANY way. They're unwillingly stuck on the sidelines just watching, unless they can manage to break through the interference somehow... You end up isolated from one another, constantly trying to reestablish contact. It turns into a desperate tug of war as host and tulpa attempt to move past the interference just to share a few short minutes together.]
This is what happened to us during July... On July 12th we began our longest bout of interference to date (unless you count Lianne's previous "dormancy"). Typically when we experience interference it'll last anywhere from 1 day up to 2 weeks.
This time, we spent 50 days in total working through varying degrees of interference. 26 of those days I was entirely alone and didn't get to hear her, see her, or feel her there at all.
[It's been REALLY taxing on both of us... We'd make a little bit of progress and get to have a short visit, then suddenly be overcome by total interference and have to start all over from square one. But as a result of the 50 days struggling to communicate and spend time together, we've realized that this is a phenomenon we need to observe and explore... We've come to understand that we're in a GREAT position to study interference, what causes it, and how to alleviate it. It's our hope to eventually produce an effective guide for combating interference at some point down the line.]
Now that we've FINALLY returned to our normal levels of communication and interaction we'll resume our usual levels of activity here on this sub.
*All that being said, Interference and Total Interference are just our terms to describe something we've experienced extensively. They're NOT official terminologies recognized by the community at large.

What About The Visual Imposition Guide?

[Some of you might remember that we'd began work on a visual imposition guide months back- It's still in the works, we promise!]
Since the guide is a joint effort, we had to put it on hold the past month and a half due to problems in communication. We'll resume work on it here in the coming days... However, it's important to note that we can't quite give an estimated release date for it. It'll take a bit to get back into the swing of writing it admittedly.
[You'd be surprised how difficult it can be to come back to working on a big project when you haven't touched it in over a month!]
Imposition is of extreme importance to us, especially visual imposition. As a result we can't help but take our time with this guide, because when it's done we want it to REALLY deliver. To us, quality will always be more important than quantity or speed.
Though rest assured, we'll get the guide done as fast as we can.

What About The Interaction Log?

We KNOW there's a handful of people among the community that actually bothered to keep up with our public interaction log for some reason, because after we stopped updating it we began getting messages about it... Quite honestly I'm still shocked people found it interesting or worth reading.
[What happened is that we noticed a few problems we had with it. The project screeched to a halt when we fully understood that the ENTIRE log being public was fundamentally changing how Jordan documented our time together and by extension affecting how much he chose to document overall. We had to take steps to address those problems as the documentation of our time together is of massive importance to him.]
I continued documenting behind the scenes in a private interaction log and am currently in the process of rebooting the public interaction log. We'll be making another post here very soon further discussing the problems we had with it and the details of how that project has changed. In that post we'll also share a new link to the updated version of our 2020 interaction log.

Patch Notes



[Anyways thanks for reading, hope you all have a GREAT day!]

- Jordan & Lianne
submitted by JordanandLianne to Tulpas [link] [comments]


Indie Speed Dating: Ghost Pirates of Vooju Island - YouTube YouTube

Speed Dating NYC - Speed Dating in ... - NY Minute Dating

  1. Indie Speed Dating: Ghost Pirates of Vooju Island - YouTube
  2. YouTube

Sigh. I went to a lot of trouble to get this to work with Windows 10 (explanation in the video) and it wasn't worth it. With around 10 minutes of opening cut... Enjoy the videos and music you love, upload original content, and share it all with friends, family, and the world on YouTube.